But it's a good show you should give it a try

Imagine if it were the episode where the gang is watching the "Jerry" pilot on TV. It would be you watching you watching you.....

Jerry's Reaction When

not really, but then again i am kind of a narcissist

You're right. Nobody watches their home movies

Its like Kayne listening to his own album and going "yo these beats are dope!"

People watch their home movies once in a while though.

I'd watch a greatest hits series with you guys watching your favorite episodes Mystery Science Theater style.

I actually feel bad for you because when my friend and I are eating lunch and need something to watch. Seinfeld is always a solid answer.

yeah honestly it would be pretty weird, I'm glad to know you don't

Really late to the party, but what about /r/SeinfeldGifs?

No

Kanye West disapproves.

That's actually kind of sad. Seinfeld has brought me so much joy over the years. Then again, I think I'd rather be in your position still.

Are you ever flipping through channels, and see Curb on, and watch it?

That's odd. I've seen a lot of video evidence that Larry Sanders watched his own late night show, frequently.

Would it be kinda like this? At 2:27 mark

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bvDk7Cz5Vhk

No, that's what nostalgia is all about. A run down memory lane once in a while.

Now if you did it daily, well, that'd be weird.

I've always loved watching myself in home videos. Maybe I'm a little narcissistic? I don't, however, like watching myself play violin in a video... I just cringe the entire time, and notice all the mistakes and point them out.

As I read this I pictured you staying it to George in the coffee shop booth.

I think I saw somewhere that Patrick Stewart watches TNG on occasion. Not that this is really relevant to you.

You should try it, it's great

so what you are saying is someone will pay to watch my home movies.

If my home movies were on tv, I'd watch them.

Why do you think I film my own sex acts?!

It's like raaaaaaiiiiin, on your wedding day!

It's different. I would imagine it's you not watching excactly you, but an icon that whole world watches. So you would be looking at you as world sees you, not as you see yourself usually.

There really is some true irony here. Anytime I'm flipping through the channels and Seinfeld is on, I turn it on. No matter what episode, I watch it and I'll always find it funny. It's sad that the creators of the show can never really have that same experience. Although maybe that's the curse of being a performer.

Matt LeBlanc says he watches Friends when he's travelling abroad since it's always on and 'hey, it's a pretty good show'!

I'd watch you watching you.

That makes me kind of sad. It's a great show, and I'm sure filming it is not as enjoyable as just getting to watch the final product.

What we really need is a video of you watching Seinfeld. Which you could then watch yourself...

so the OPPOSITE of Bojack Horseman

These shows are dope.

I don't know, Seinfeld is pretty cool, you should watch it ;)

But it's so good.

If my home movies were on TV I'd watch them.

We'll be asking the questions here Jerry.

You aren't missing much, it is just a show about "nothing"

I can highly recommend it

Would be great if the reddit kids took note here and stopped using the F word like a common noun.

Not at all. Patrick Stewart does it!

Yes it'd be like listening to yourself while on a call. Thank you for a show I can still watch everyday. It has lasted the test of time unlike a lot of other 90s sitcoms.

You seem to be pretty into yourself though so I could see you doing it ;)

I don't care.

Its okay, you aren't missing anything.

That's a great strategy on Stewart's part. He only really has to tell the story on one late-night talk show, but then all of the thousands of hotel employees who have caught him at his secret shame over the years will nod knowingly and think, "oh, so it was just one of those weird one-off things."

This is the story I'm telling myself now.

That could easily be a plot to a Seinfeld episode

What if Bill Murray was rewatching Groundhog Day, and repeating the lines the characters say, before they say them?

He tries to hide what he's doing but it's too late. The room service guy has seen everything.

That would be, like, the perfect Avery Bullock experience. I can see the room service guy standing there and a manic Stewart eagerly trying to get him to watch the episode with him. Like Avery Bullock on American Dad and the room service guy is Stan Smith.

"Stan! Here it is, this is the best part... Wasn't that the best part?! Now get out while I take your daughter to Pound Town. She likes the dirt road." slams door without tipping

Bojack Horseman.

I like to imagine there's an untold side of that story where the chef of the fancy hotel Patrick Stewart was staying at had grown up dirt poor in a village where all he had was a chipped up cooking pot, a set of knives, whatever food he could steal/scavenge/forage, a near broken TV, and a VCR with old VHS tapes of TNG. But those tapes and their themes of noble voyage forward and reaching unbelievable and unexpected places motivated him to pursue his dream of becoming the head chef of the best restaurant in the best hotel in the world, and were also how he learned English. After finally reaching his lifelong dream through some miraculous series of events, combined with sheer hard work and unbreakable determination, he learns one day that Patrick Stewart himself is a guest in the hotel. After specifically requesting to work during the afternoons and evenings of his stay in the event Stewart orders from the restaurant, he excitedly receives notice that Stewart has ordered room service.

He crafts the most beautiful meal of his entire career, every ingredient and dish cooked and prepared and placed perfectly. Then, with a mix of pure joy and anxiety, he personally delivers the meal to Stewart's room. His mind racing a million miles a minute with each step. Is Stewart really a fan of Star Trek? What if he's nothing like Captain Picard? They always say to never meet your idols....

Then the door to Stewart's room opens, and he's greeted by Jean-Luc Picard himself, beaming smile, watching the chef's favorite episode of Star Trek ever, the one he'd rewound the tape on and turned to inspiration in so many dark nights growing up in the favela.

The sudden registry of everything he's seeing is just too much for his mind to process, and he's left stammering, shaking, and pretends to be a mere food server while a suddenly incredibly embarrassed Patrick Stewart decides he needs to rush him out the door.

The door shut, the chef stares at the $20 bill he's accepted as tip for delivering the food. He slumps down against the wall, crying.

It's not so bad. Often times dedicated actors/actresses will go back and rewatch old shit they did not for recreational purposes but because they are researching their character and the relationship he/she has with other characters in anticipation of future projects, or simply to be able to speak knowledgeably about the roles they've portrayed when they are being interviewed. Busy Hollywood types might have a lot of shit going on that they can't keep fresh in their minds.

That could have been his excuse.

I totally remember this interview; IIRC it was in the late 90s early 00s he was promoting X Men, maybe even Insurrection.

Got lost trying to find it, forgot all about jerry =p

If I was that room service guy I would have watched it with him!

I think if I caught Patrick Stewart watching TNG, I'd be ecstatic. He should be proud of what he helped create, and if he doesn't remember episodes, all the more reason to sit and enjoy them. He can finally watch them through the same eyes we did.

Would like to see that story. Patrick Stewart is a national treasure

I hope that at some point in the future Patrick Stewart is in a hotel room flipping channels and finds a 'Best of Conan' show and finds this interview. His room service could then arrive and find hum watching himself recounting a tale of watching himself when room service arrives.

Does anyone know which episode it was?

Great question.

How Bojack Horseman of him

[deleted]

I had a similar, underappreciated, thought. I find it funny that a city will ticket a car over and over, basically saying "please move your car. Please move your car." Until one day they decide they no longer want you to move your car and they throw a boot on it.

When you pick out a dry cleaner you need to consider both the drop-off and pick-up experience.

G|------------------------------------------------|

D|-------2---------------4-------------b4~---------|

A|----1-4----1-2-2-5-------------b1-b2------------|

E|2-2---------------4-3-2-2-445-------------------|

     s  s  s  sp   s s s ss s sps sss  s  s   p

try r/Showerthoughts instead.

Yea, Jerry. That's a terrible joke.

Please explain this, I am an idiot.

I get it. It's just like sending a postcard from anywhere in the world, but only being able to receive a postcard at a single physical location.

It's not funny, but I get it.

That would've made a great joke in a Seinfeld episode with Jerry constantly trying the joke out on each member of the gang with them saying they get it but it's not funny. The end joke before credits could be Jerry telling it one last time his dry cleaner and them either laughing or also agreeing it isn't funny.

I laughed out loud at that just now.

I think it'd be a good 15 second bit in a show. Almost reminds me of one of those cut and dry Mitch Hedberg one line deliveries.

It's like the opposite of depositing money at only your bank, but taking it out at any ATM.

What's funny is that you find it funny but nobody else does. Kind of like my Dad and every shitty joke he's ever made.

Oh God I'm so sorry Mr. Seinfeld.

I don't get it :-(

What's not to get?

Why is that funny? I don't get it.

it is funny cause it is like confucious style comedy, i like it

Too Existential.

That's some dry humor right there

It's like a Zen koan

That's not very funny Jerry.

I get it.

I get it Jerry!!!!

Took me a minute, but that was a hilarious joke once I imagined it being told by Mitch Hedberg.

I get it!

So you'll probably find my pun of Hiltler funny? You know, like a sword hilt with a tiny moustache?

No?

Ok. :(

High thoughts with Seinfeld.

Are you in a Chrysler Pacifica minivan with him?

Reminds me of a younger George Carlin joke:

You ever notice that when you're wearing a hat, if you wear it for a long time it feels like it's not there?

But then, when you take it off... it feels like it's still there?

with Jim Gaffigan

Comedians in Cars eating Hot Pockets

Didn't you do that joke in some Seinfeld episode?

at the time of writing, I'm on S09E09, going through the show for the nth time, and I'm positive you're talking about that joke at some point.

It took me about 2 seconds, but once I got it, it's actually pretty fucking hilarious. You still got it.

I prefer jokes that you don't have to think about... Like the word "puke".

That's a funny word

Jerry, how about a Hooooooooooooot Poooockets discussion with Jim Gaffingan on CCC? I love that bit by Jim....really my favorite topic of his. His self dialogue is also pretty funny throughout his acts.

Marriage is just like that.

Tomorrow, in /r/showerthoughts...

Wut

Ha! 'Cause the dry cleaning is at the place you dropped it off at. Love it.

I was building the elevators in Jerry's building. Wish I wasn't still doing that so I could have contributed to this.

By the way, this is the only reason why time runs forward in our universe and never backwards. So physicists will get your Boltzmann equation joke.

That's more of a showerthought than a joke, really.

I don't get it

People get it, the joke just sucks.

I don't get it.

It's probably because most people don't use dry cleaning.

Like library books!

It's not that we don't get it, Jerry. It's just that it's not that great of a joke.

Damn it, you just spoiled an episode of CCC for me.

To everyone saying it's not funny or they don't get it: he's not telling the joke, he's saying this is what the joke is about. It's the premise that the joke would be built on.

As a comedian you should be aware that logic-based jokes are doomed.

I get it, but how is it funny?

Hah, great showerthought. This is definitely coming up on /r/showerthoughts next week.

I was actually thinking about this yesterday! I dropped off a dress for an alteration, and I thought, isn't it weird that I can take it anywhere to have this done, but I have to pick it up here? You and I are on the same wavelength.

I think that shits hilarious

yea, I don't get it. like, I get it, but I don't "get" it.

I don't get it, please explain

That's George right there

I get it, but it isn't all that funny. Sounds like a Jerry Seinfeld joke.

: ^)

It is funny, especially if the punch line is delivered as an after thought.

I don't get it.

It took me a moment, but I got it! That is funny.

Oddly enough, I work with the guy who's bus you're using for that episode.

holy shit I just realized you're /r/showerthoughts except living

That's just an observation...

yea. but whats the joke?

I've ordered pizzas at thousands of restaurants but I only pick them up at Luigi's.

EternallyXIII just gave you a golden joke. You should send him (and me) a box set bluray Seinfeld collection.

EternallyXIII just gave you a golden joke. You should send him (and me) a box set bluray Seinfeld collection.

Please write, star in and produce a new sitcom?

I don't get it

I had this same thought a couple days ago with the pharmacy.

That almost sounds like a Mitch Hedberg bit, which I consider high praise.

That's very... Hedberg-esque.

/r/ShowerThoughts

HI JERRY!

Oh they get it.

What if you drop off your dry cleaning at two different places? Gotta keep the ma and pa stores in business!

I literally had this thought today.

That's the most Jerry Seinfeld thing I've heard in my entire life.

I'd laugh.

whom

The worst part is when your new shirt says "dry clean only". Before I went into the store, my cleaning choices were wide open. I could have cleaned it any way I liked. But I walk out with that shirt and suddenly I am subjected to the tyranny of picking that shirt up at a single dry cleaning location.

I love this. I'm going to tell this to everyone I know.

Your choices become drastically narrowed.

Maybe say it like that, that I got.

Hahahahaha. I would have spit out my coffee if I wasn't drinking tea.

Wha? I'm a Canadian, I have a car, I drink coffee... I don't get it. Who does your dry cleaning? We have Tim Hortons here btw.

I don't get it.

when you drop your dry cleaning off, you can go to any dry cleaner you want, but when you pick it up, you can only go to one

Kinda reminds me of /r/Showerthoughts

Nobody probably gets it because your grammar is shit.

when you want to drop your dry cleaning off you can go to any dry cleaner you want but when you want to pick it up, you can only go to one

I think a lot of comedy movies do tend to cause fatigue after enough jokes. An hour long standup special is probably the longest amount of straight comedy I can take.

And you have succeded

The bee movie was pretty fantastic :)

"Do you have TiVo?"

"No but we have Hive-O, but it's a disease, a horrible horrible disease"

I liked you as the bee.

[deleted]

A follow-up question:

What movie role has been the hardest to turn down for you?

I really enjoyed your cameo on Top Five, I think that sticking to short scenes with real friends is the way to go- especially when strippers are involved

Does Larry David get mad when you say this in response to the Curb movie?

You could do a movie with no story. The problem with movies is that they have to have a narrative arch, but your show was always about the plot being nothing, so just do a movie without worrying about structure or having a beginning or end, or moral, or even point. Just a 1.5-2.5 hour long slice of a situation where everything happening is comedic, you get to know the characters, you laugh and it just randomly ends.

To me, the funniest things are shorter

That explains my ex's girlfriends laughing at me during sex.

Do you mean you don't think you'll be able to use that medium effectively, or that movies generally can't really be funny?

You could do a cameo and people would flip their shit.

Damn, this is something I never considered.

Also because he is busy not doing anything stressful ever again.

ASDF1234QWER5678

Why would you be limited to a comedy? Surely you have the ability to be dramatic. (Not calling you Shirley)

Your cameo was great in Top Five. And that was a funny movie.

That's coz movies, including comedies, is just as much about deep relationships and moral messages as much as it is about being funny. A lot of time, good jokes are sacrificed for the good of the structure of the film. But that being said, you get twice substance in a good comedy film. you get a heartfelt story with a strong message and a lot of laughs.

Yes thank you for not making tons of mediocre content just to pump it out, as so many comedians do nowadays.

I think you're spot on, haven't see a comedy movie that has actually made me laugh in ages. I love a lot of stand up specials though and they tend to be a bit longer.

Shakespeare once said,

"Brevity is the soul of wit"

Bee Movie is the greatest film I've ever seen.

That's very astute. I hate 'funny movies' nowadays. In the 70s and 80s, comedy movies were just... different... Leslie Nielsen was able to keep the laughs coming for the entire show. Nowadays it's like they get all the good laughs out in the first hour, and the second hour is rehashing material or cheap, easy ones. The schtick usually falls apart by then.

[deleted]

Jerry, you do movies....just voice acting though...like Bee Movie. Enjoyed your voice acting in that one.

The Marx Brothers would disagree with you.

That said, I tend to agree with you as I haven't seen an actual comedy in years. Most of them are just awkward situations and the comedy is built around it.

Rodney Dangerfield in Back to School was brilliant. Plus we got to see Sam Kinison as Professor Turgidson. You should find/write the right script.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Hn9xAaKUbw

Brevity is the soul of wit.

Hamlet Act 2, scene 2, 90

That's a great, honest answer!

Yea but if you did do a movie there would be a lot of buzz surrounding it.

Why not do cameos? Or short films?

I don't wanna talk about comedians in cars, I wanna talk about RAMPART!!

Translation: Usain Bolt wouldn't win gold medals running marathons.

Brevity is the soul of wit

-Shakespeare (I think)

What is the shortest way you can make someone laugh?

ahem bee movie

you are right, the funniest things are shorter ( insert penis joke here )

Jerry only makes B movies, everyone knows that.

I love this answer. It's so simple and demonstrably true but I had not connected it in my head.

Please pass along this information to Adam Sandler.

the funniest things are shorter pretty much what my ex said before she left

What do you think of the trend of comedy films to go to 2+ hours in the last decade? Seems like Judd Apatow and Paul Feig are making movies that are always about 30 minutes too long.

What about Bee Movie?

I thought Bee Movie was brilliant and a blast to watch

Wasn't The Seinfeld Chronicles supposed to be a 90 minute special, but you ended up making 90 hours+? Maybe sustaining comedy for the length of a movie doesn't have to be as hard as you think it is. I'd love a 90 minute comedy film starring you.

Jerry don't forget Bee Movie

Any movie comedies you like?

Well... There was bee movie.

I've never enjoyed comedy films for that reason, the first 30 minutes is usually hilarious but then when a plot is forced in it just becomes dull and is no longer funny save for a few one liners.

Never short of laughter from you Jerry! Thanks

I can't think of many movies that have made me laugh. A large reason because this is that TV shows let you know characters over the course of multiple seasons. Everything is funnier with running gags and continuity, the ability to say "Yeah... that totally is something that character would do!"

You might like Peter Kays car share then, (British Humor)

Brevity is the soul of whit.

But didn't you do that Bee movie?

The exploration of this should be part of the course at Columbia.

haha i was listening to the bill burr podcast when he mentioned you. Apparently he was riding along when he spotted a great car with suicide doors. He asks why there arent any more cars with that style door and you answer him that it makes the car frame weaker. I remember him saying that he asked it again but a bit later and you saying "i just told you that". Made me rile with laughter because yeah, that does seem like you. thanks for all the great moments

Movies ruin everything. You could do an .75 hour on a network and it'd be better than some shit movie like "look what I did"

I would think it would give one a great challenge to create a comedy that's well written given the length of your typical movie.

This is so true. It's almost as if I start to cringe after the 20 minute mark of any comedy.

Absolutely agree. I've hardly come across a comedy movie I like. Except Bee Movie, of course! lol But I love sitcoms.

Usually that's true. But there was this one movie about a bunch of bees several years ago. I wish I could remember what that bee movie was called, or the name of the comedian behind it.

To me, the funniest things are shorter

My GF agrees, she always laughs at it

Hey, the Bee movie was OK, I thought. That's a movie.

Bee Movie

Hey I almost watched bee movie once.

To YOUR brand of great comedy. FTFY, Seinfeld.

Were you demoralized from participating in more big screen projects by Bee Movie not being the success you had hoped for?

'Popstar: Never Stop Never Stoping' is definite proof you can...

...although not make the best box office return.

I think Sacha Baron-Cohen would disagree.

it lends itself to people saying, "Hey, I made a movie."

Too true

Dear Mr. Seinfeld,

I must say that you are a poor comedian and I find that one show Seinfeld to be absolutely torturous. That is all.

Very sincerely.

Union_of_Onion

That's gold Jerry gold!!

I guess it was just at B-Movie.

IIRC, in Judd Appatow's interview with him, Seinfeld admits that " Bee Movie was a painful experience the whole way through "

"You see a bad movie, that's two hours. You're IN a bad movie, that's two years!"

So, what challenges are you facing these days?

Asking a simple "how so?" often draws people even deeper.

And if people generally aren't interested in you back or ever ask you any questions about yourself, that's a pretty good indicator that they're probably not worth your time.

The sad truth is, people are only interested in themselves.

I don't believe that. People may prioritize themselves over others but those same people have a wide range of interests outside of themselves. It's healthy to be interested in yourself.

I must be the exception to that rule because I don't like talking about myself. I immediately change the subject. My best conversation always begin with someone diving right into a meaty topic. Arguments are fun too.

I realize I've just talked about myself, but don't think I enjoyed it.

Funny. When I ask girls how they are doing or how they feel I get no response.

I don't actually think that's entirely true. People are interested in more than themselves, it's just easier to talk about yourself, because you're right there and you have reminder cues handy.

That's why I wear these sneakers, in case anything happens... * pretends to run off *

FUNNY GUY!!!

Oh man that's a really great question to go for. I'm gonna totally use that. Thanks, Jerry!

TIL I'm not most people..

yes we know....running a B&B the best thing you can do is ask question and listen, listen, listen....the wiser you get the least you say:)

“You know what truth is? [...] It's some crazy thing my neighbor believes. If I want to make friends with him, I ask him what he believes. He tells me, and I say, "Yeah, yeah - ain't it the truth?”

Vonnegut

My grandmother always said "if you want someone to think you're interesting, as them about themselves."

How many challenges? Always ask questions with a number answer.

I've tried that, but instead of running, I finally tell them to shut up because I don't care about their boring life.

Few people who's opinion I respect more than Jerry Seinfeld.

Although, lots of people have called me judgemental for acting similar.

Yes, making judgments is a terrible idea (sarcasm). Or maybe just expressing them to people who aren't ready to hear them.

So much truth. But once realized, it unlocks so many doors. Wondering if you've also read Dale Carnegie's "How to Win Friends & Influence People"?

At risk of being late to the party,would you befriend a Kramer

Tell 3 things, they tell you everything. Been working for me for a while.

Saving this

"the sad truth is, people are only interested in themselves"

Probably explains why AMA are so popular.

... Wait a minute.

It makes me a little sad for all of us. We're trapped in our heads, experiencing our struggles and triumphs, and no one experiences them all but us.

We are hungry to share those moments and feelings with others, because we want to be connected and share what it feels like to live.

But it's seen as selfish, so we need to share just enough given the social context and no more. So we're forever trapped in our personal worlds, dying for company, never fully satisfied.

I asked them and ran, but now what do I do? I don't think they'd hear me even if I yelled to them. Should I just call?

I assume you will find no shortage of friends willing to give you practice slaps.

Getting sound advice from the legend himself, that is more valuable than you know. Take this /u/magicsebi and run with it.

I never had anyone slap me as I practiced this must be why I failed and not the general lack of talent or dedication.

Fail to prepare. Prepare to fail

If it hasn't already been done, this idea needs to be the training montage in a "sports hero where the sport is comedy" movie.

I did this when I was planning to lose my virginity.

What would you recommend as a good start for someone who prefers comedy writing as a medium rather than performance comedy?

This is great advice for any kind of point you want to get across to someone who's paying you.

Your boss

Your colleagues

Your audience.

Similar advice from Tim Urban (Wait but Why?) on preparation for public speaking. Somewhat oddly, he references Seinfeld at the top of the essay.

Do you have images of your jokes that show your rewrites and changes to get it right? There was once an image in Times showing your rewrites and I would like to use it as an example for my son of someone like you interating to get it correct-it would be a useful lesson for young kids. Are you able to share some?

The punchline being how you can't believe he has done that.

As a seasoned stand-up comic with twelve open-mics under my belt, I can confirm Jerry Seinfeld's advice is accurate.

One might even say that this is indeed the measure of a true friend.

Wise words from a decent man

As a teacher, winging can bring about great comedic situations and stories. My best teaching moments have had a tone of prep work and a willingness to wing it.

This is my public speaking philosophy. Memorize your speech until you know it word for word. By the time you have to speak it flows naturally and ad libing becomes much easier. When I explain to others they usually write the method off as being too robotic.

Forming a joke for my first open mic, thank you for this.

He's telling the truth. Whenever I want to know who the good comedians are, I slap them in the middle of their routine.

I misread that as mesmerized. No wonder things didn't go so well....

I need to remember this...

Winging it like Michael Richards?

http://i.imgur.com/6cMlBQw.png

but got solid laugh with that.

it is a solid joke

Lol i like that.

Confirmed solid laugh here.

Was more of a snort come to think of it.

That's a good joke actually. The first one.

And you're getting a solid laugh from me right now— nice.

I like that you said Jerry plays a comedian on TV the most, as if its not his actual job outside of the show

Don't leave us hanging, what was it?

Man, I should really get back into stand up. I've done a couple of performances, but after reading this thread, maybe I should get back into the whole thing

Ha, I like it. Did that bit keep going once you had note out?

Like, Scrumple note and toss it angrily. 'Fucking heiroglyphics!' Or something.

Yeah but you didn't write that. I'm pretty sure that English comedian Chris Turner wrote that joke.

Always do the banana joke first.

reminds me of the bob odenkirk bazooka joke set. one of my favs

I hope you read it in Classical Greek.

That's gold.

That is actually fantastic

I've always wanted to try an open mic. I have a few good ideas about this one time I was at a bar where there was a comedian who looked almost exactly like me just shitting all over himself as his material.

That's pretty funny. Have you thought about extending the joke some more? Like after that punch line continue with a joke about something relative to the time period.

I audibly laughed, and that was without any delivery

I audibly laughed at this. Keep doing your thing

laughed out loud at this

Would have been better if you pulled out a pocket bible

I snorted air out of my nose while half smiling just from reading it. I bet you killed.

The "B.C." is a particularly nice touch, as well as the specificity of it being the 4th century. Nice work.

Heh, that made me exhale audibly, which, on the internet, is basically a lol, considering I'm in an office right now.

Do you remember the joke?

i had a solid push of air blow through my nose after reading that.

solid indeed.

You got gold Jerry, gold!

What was the joke? Lol

Eh, don't quit your day job...

Huh... That sounds like good advice. I'll definitely try that when practicing for my next gig.

This is some seriously awesome advice for any kind of public performance.

Note to self: Bring 3 portable radios with me the next time I want to heckle someone.

Damn, this is great. Thanks!

marine biologist

"The sea was angry that day, my friends - like an old man trying to send back soup in a deli."

From the moment George says "the sea was angry that day, my friend" to the moment he holds up the golf ball is the funniest minute on television. I still laugh at that scene every time. Thanks

"Is anyone here a marine biologist!?" Is, in context, the funniest single line ever written.

http://i.imgur.com/xNxo2.gifv

Is that a Titleist?!

The scene in question

When Larry screams off-camera, "Is anyone here a marine biologist?!" I lose it.

You gave us the word regift? That more than any other Seinfeldism I just assumed happened naturally.

Did you come up with 'Yeah I like this idea'? Also who came up with the whole Bob Sackamano bit?

It's funny you say that because Jason Alexander attributes that moment to Larry...

https://youtu.be/Ye3bFno_1NU?t=474

The finale : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0u8KUgUqprw

All of my salads are "big salads." And I'm always sure to thank my bf profusely when he buys me one.

My favorite episode!

Is this true then? https://youtu.be/Ye3bFno_1NU?t=474

I also love "unvitation" and the Indian wedding. That was a unique episode - how was that conceived?

This was the episode that got me hooked on your show. I admit I didn't watch from the beginning but I did give it a try in syndication and it happened to be this ep. When George reveals the golf ball at the end....classic and made me a fan for life.

I was a very big fan of the show.

Of your own show? Get outta here....no way!

This was the single funniest moment of the series for me.

I remember watching this episode when I was about six and of all the reactions Kramer could've given, "a hole in one" was the one I least expected and I went into a laughing fit every time I thought of it for a couple weeks. Thank you for your incredible contribution to comedy!

The other day my boss came running out of his office, picked up a bag of pretzels we had for snacks (I work with youth) and yelled out "these pretzels are making me thirsty!!"

We all cracked up laughing and then went on to each give another way of saying it. It was excellent.

My absolute favorite scene from all the episodes.

What about shrinkage, was that even a word before?

I think the best Seinfeld episode idea I ever contributed was that George pretending to be a marine biologist

My family jokes that the show should've been called 'George'. David Alexander upstaged everyone.

Seinfeld came up with the term regifting?

Thank you so much for that episode! I giggle every single time I watch it. Especially the entire ending.

All of my salads are "big salads." And I'm always sure to thank my bf profusely when he buys me one.

This is my favorite episode, for sure!

Link to the end of the episode: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p_FoG0BpDUc

Oh man, and that's easily one of the show's greatest moments.

The Marine Biologist is one of my favorite episodes of television history. Hilarious!

Was "double-dip" an original Seinfeldism?