๐๏ธ MisterBazadin ยท 4646 points ยท Posted at 18:08:26 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)*
It was a regular Saturday evening and I was doing the theatre cleaning gig and had some downtime before the next show got out. There was a popular R-Rated movie playing in one of our back theatres, so we had to keep an eye on it to make sure people didnโt sneak in (I think it was 8 mile or something). Enter the group of 5 teenagers, 2 guys and 3 girls. They had tickets for some other god awful kids movie, and on their way down they all magically had to go to the bathroom (a common sneak trick). Seeing this, I went inside the door to the 8mile theatre and waited.
Lo and behold not 2 minutes come by when the group walks in. I ask for their tickets (now our tickets were more of a regular sheet paper quality than the normal card-stocky kind) and surprisingly none of them could find them. I tell them straight up I know what movie theyโre bought tickets for, so they have to go there or get out. The lead a-hole, who has a small soft drink, just steps up, looks me dead in the eye and says, โHave it your way โฆ oops, my hands are slipperyโ and just upends his cup which goes spilling all over the floor. โI guess youโll have to clean that up nowโ
Holding back rage, I motion for them to get out and they start huffing and puffing that theyโll tell a manager that I did this and that. So finally I ask for their tickets or Iโll call security. They finally produce the paper stubs. I grab each ticket, ball them up together, put it in my mouth, chew and swallow. They just stared at me.
I then radioed my manager to call security because I had some unruly teenagers that snuck in and refused to leave. When the security guy comes with my manager, they are all explaining that I ate their tickets, blah blah blah. My manager looked at me, scoffed and kicked them out. The best part was that one of their parents paid for the tickets, so when they went by box office, my manager asked one of the girls if they remembered them โฆ and of course they didnโt.
Kids got banned and couldnโt come back.
charlottechewie ยท 1218 points ยท Posted at 20:13:41 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
This is fucking genius. Like movie genius. You did something so illogical that it couldn't be believed by the manager. Hilarious!
๐๏ธ MisterBazadin ยท 475 points ยท Posted at 20:15:22 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Exactly . . . why would MisterBazadin ever eat a ticket?!
tknames ยท 123 points ยท Posted at 22:58:24 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)*
Let alone 4. That's awesome. You are the man (or woman, can't tell from the context).
Edit: it has been pointed out that it was 5 tickets. I would correct my error but the following funny stuff would be less funny if I did, so it's staying.
LadyPoecilotheria ยท 126 points ยท Posted at 23:05:06 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
5
load_more_comets ยท 189 points ยท Posted at 23:56:52 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
MisterBazadin neglected to tell us that he also ate one of the teenagers.
Barteringram ยท 47 points ยท Posted at 00:57:24 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
And left one ticket. Because, why?
IAmAWizard_AMA ยท 46 points ยท Posted at 02:56:35 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
The manager will never believe that OP ate a teenager! It's genius!
Redici ยท 18 points ยท Posted at 01:24:09 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Exactly
[deleted] ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 13:56:03 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
He was obviously full.
WolfyCat ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 17:36:33 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Because he's a CRIMINAL!
[deleted] ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 23:35:00 on December 15, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Because who would want to watch a movie on their own?
Latrodectian ยท 17 points ยท Posted at 02:27:00 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
It's the Catbird Seat gambit!
[deleted] ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 06:41:12 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
[deleted]
Latrodectian ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 06:49:14 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Huh, people were actually assigned this? I assume it's a sort of 'classic' whose pedagogical value is supposed to stem from you connecting the dots--i.e. the protag's plan to discredit the woman. Maybe a subtle way of teaching you about gaslighting? Idk.
True story: Years ago I bought a used book and the bookmark in it said 'In the Catbird Seat' and looked like the logo of some quirky vintage shoppe. When I googled the phrase I found the story instead, and read it. Don't think I ever found the actual thing the bookmark was advertising.
MAN_UP_LOSER ยท 25 points ยท Posted at 23:13:49 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Schwarzfahrer
lethal_forcekins ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 01:33:05 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I also thought of this film while reading this post, always makes me laugh
AntonChigursCoin ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 11:25:48 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I cat believe someone else saw this
Barrel-rider ยท 6 points ยท Posted at 23:39:15 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Two words: Plausible deniability.
p1ccard ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 16:42:30 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
It's a well know fact that contracts are rendered null when eaten. Even if there was dry ink on it for well over a fortnight.
NibblyPig ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 03:15:14 on December 13, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
That's some fight club level shit
Skippy8898 ยท 243 points ยท Posted at 18:41:28 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
So what do ticket stubs taste like?
๐๏ธ MisterBazadin ยท 834 points ยท Posted at 18:45:22 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Sweet buttery justice.
demela ยท 47 points ยท Posted at 21:04:38 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Now I'm making popcorn when I get home.
mike413 ยท 7 points ยท Posted at 02:12:29 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
so like a free cup of ice?
Lord_Nuke ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 20:27:07 on February 1, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
What was the poop like?
Alamagoozlum ยท 23 points ยท Posted at 00:30:15 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Very bland but sometimes the ink gives it a little flavor. I used to nibble on paper when I was a kid.
SalamalaS ยท 10 points ยท Posted at 06:29:03 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
"kid" I do it all the time to annoy other people.
Also chewing up and spitting out bank deposit slips is a great way to keep other ppl from reading them.
LordTwinkie ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 12:07:09 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)*
Thermal paper used for a lot of receipts tastes god awful.
Coplate ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 15:07:08 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Its also coated in BPA, so, plan carefully.
neuropharm115 ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 15:08:41 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Those typically have crazy high concentrations of BPA or other toxic plasticizers... Definitely wouldn't recommend eating those!
LordTwinkie ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 19:08:18 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Meh wasn't like it was a part of my daily diet.
nothing_showing ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 15:49:53 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Well, does it taste good, or awful?
Also, you probably have cancer:
http://health.usnews.com/health-news/articles/2014/02/25/cashiers-may-absorb-controversial-chemical-when-handling-receipts
LordTwinkie ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 19:06:58 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Meant god awful, also I'm not concerned about BPA especially in those thermal receipts I only tried to eat a few. Try being the operative word because they were nasty. So I spit rather than swallow.
iczk ยท 8 points ยท Posted at 22:16:27 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Pretty sure it tastes like this.
HyruleanHero1988 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 14:26:06 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
The papery type of movie ticket stubs smell like mushrooms. Anyone else ever noticed that?
godless-life ยท 906 points ยท Posted at 18:33:36 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
That's the absolute best revenge story I ever read on this sub. All available thumbs up!
๐๏ธ MisterBazadin ยท 226 points ยท Posted at 18:36:05 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Thanks!
ryuujinusa ยท 18 points ยท Posted at 00:26:01 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Did you get sick?
๐๏ธ MisterBazadin ยท 47 points ยท Posted at 00:26:55 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
No sir, I was fine afterward.
porkabeefy ยท 119 points ยท Posted at 01:31:12 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
You'll need to teach my wife to swallow a wad like that
gg249 ยท 71 points ยท Posted at 02:28:15 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
ok send her over
porkabeefy ยท 31 points ยท Posted at 02:47:23 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Teach her to deep throat too. That would be awesome
I_am_the_7th_letter ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 06:48:35 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Oh shit, shots fired!
c0ldsh0w3r ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 07:00:06 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
It's just a long slow swallow.
astralparadox ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 05:10:10 on December 13, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Unfortunately, it's hard to teach a hand to deep throat anything.
porkabeefy ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 00:49:48 on December 14, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
You should probably focus on getting deep throated by people then...
Nder_Wiggin ยท -14 points ยท Posted at 03:16:05 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Call the fire department cuz that's a third degree burn!
IAmAWizard_AMA ยท 17 points ยท Posted at 02:57:23 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
She has no problem when she's with me
-deebrie- ยท 16 points ยท Posted at 03:30:32 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
That's because your dick is microscopic
IAmAWizard_AMA ยท 40 points ยท Posted at 03:52:23 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Well that backfired
Firasissex ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 02:29:56 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
-"Glen, I love your wads!"
BIkerAC ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 05:53:50 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I'm working with some very unstable herbs.
rainbowhotpocket ยท 64 points ยท Posted at 22:00:37 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Although if you said they weren't making trouble (till the asshole kid), why would you kick em out? Understandable after the little bitch spilled his drink but...
๐๏ธ MisterBazadin ยท 273 points ยท Posted at 22:04:03 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
They were being loud and obnoxious in the lobby. They seemed to be the type that would have been loud and obnoxious in the theatre too. After working there for a while, you get a feel for that type of group.
rainbowhotpocket ยท 47 points ยท Posted at 22:24:33 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Fair enough, and great creativity in your revenge!
comach2 ยท 64 points ยท Posted at 23:25:51 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Besides, they aren't supposed to be in that movie anyway. Technically he should be kicking them out regardless of their behavior, that's part of his job- just because he felt generous some days and didn't kick people out, isn't a reason to expect that to be the norm
rainbowhotpocket ยท 13 points ยท Posted at 23:30:43 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
For sure, i was just wondering since he said usually he lets people stay.
Robert_Cannelin ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 13:02:35 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Eh, the theater rating system is an idiot's joke anyway.
ghostdunks ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 10:37:36 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
You can spot douches by their general douchebaggery behaviour in most social situations and I doubt they confine said douchebag behaviour to only specific situations. Once the telltale signs come out, they might as well have a sign saying "I'm gonna be causing trouble"
Arfmeow ยท -2 points ยท Posted at 03:57:00 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
What was eating paper like?
domain101 ยท 6 points ยท Posted at 21:04:16 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
More than just petty, this was full on diabolical revenge!
zehamberglar ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 04:25:45 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Diverting power to the up-vote, captain.
charlottechewie ยท 19 points ยท Posted at 20:27:44 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
This, I hate the stories on this sub that aren't really revenge, but douche bag moves. This one is great.
mr_orpheus ยท 253 points ยท Posted at 20:04:25 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Holy shit. Out of all the things I expected to happen, your eating their tickets was not one of them. Goddamn. Amazing. I can only imagine what their expressions were like when it happened.
๐๏ธ MisterBazadin ยท 103 points ยท Posted at 20:05:09 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
The only word I can think of to describe it is: Satisfying (to me)
kidkrush ยท 29 points ยท Posted at 22:50:56 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Genius. Do something so crazy that your boss wouldn't believe it when they tattled on you
i_sigh_less ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 13:36:43 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Not just his boss, but their parents either. No one is going to believe that story, so it doesn't hurt the employee or the theater.
vsn611 ยท 181 points ยท Posted at 19:58:20 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Halfway through I thought to myself, "I hope OP makes them watch the kids movie"... your ending is much more satisfying
๐๏ธ MisterBazadin ยท 125 points ยท Posted at 20:04:01 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Most of the time, I'd let them go watch whatever they paid for. If they were good sports and had tickets for something shitty, I didn't mind them going to see something that wasn't R rated. These fuckers deserved what they got.
probablyhrenrai ยท 27 points ยท Posted at 23:05:59 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Oh, absolutely. As a normally restrained person, the rare occasions when I just the asshole have it are that much more satisfying. Your story? Fucking ace. I'd probably be holding back a shitstorm of giggles when the manager didn't believe the kids.
SgtBrowncoat ยท 136 points ยท Posted at 21:11:42 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
When you described the paper the tickets were printed on I thought, "that is an oddly specific detail to point out" - kind of like a film pointing out a character was a fencing champion in college "hmm, wonder if there will be a sword fight later?"
Still didn't see it coming.
๐๏ธ MisterBazadin ยท 108 points ยท Posted at 21:17:08 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Well, I worked in a movie theatre . . . I was well versed in unseen plot twists.
For_Teh_Lurks ยท 24 points ยท Posted at 03:50:49 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
All right, calm down M. Night Shyamallamadingdongditch.
vezance ยท 8 points ยท Posted at 04:08:00 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Shh bby is ok
bubba_feet ยท 42 points ยท Posted at 22:45:42 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
chekhov's ticket stub.
NoteBlock08 ยท 25 points ยท Posted at 03:31:43 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
A beautifully executed Chekhov's gun. Specific enough to be important, but mundane enough to be easily overlooked.
SalamalaS ยท 10 points ยท Posted at 06:37:01 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I just spend almost an hour on this website. It's fantastic.
NoteBlock08 ยท 7 points ยท Posted at 12:25:25 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Be careful, TV Tropes will ruin your life!
Seriously though I love that site! But after spending enough time on it you start to mentally point out every trope you can find whenever you read/watch/play anything. Kinda like a literary Tetris Effect.
mandyrooba ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 15:26:41 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Case in point.
CustosClavium ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 01:09:15 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
You know, for a security guard, he had an awful lot of information, don't ya think?
TheOutrageousClaire ยท 88 points ยท Posted at 21:32:39 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I put in about 4 years at a theatre, too. We all got kind of sadistic when it came to kicking kids out of R rateds. There was something fun about ruining some suburban entitled brat's night. I'd volunteer to work door for horror movies.
During the day though I only kicked kids out of movies if they were little assholes or if they acted all suspicious and nervous and made it obvious, which is just about every time. It's like, come on kid, my manager is going to see you actin a fool, I have to stop you. Just relax and walk in like it's no big deal!
Once I had a kid hand me a ticket to Kung Fu Panda 2 and he was wearing a t-shirt with the baby from Hangover. I don't know if it was Hangover 2 or 3, but it was opening night for one of them. He just smiled when he gave me his ticket, with all the confidence in the world, so I told him which theater the Hangover was in and winked. I just admired his nonchalance about it. Don't act a fool and you can see your grown up movies, kids.
These kids you dealt with in this tale of revenge were entitled little shits. The second you said a kid dumped his drink I thought OH SHIT NO, I AM RADIOING MY MANAGER. I felt the rage for you, man. That's so beyond shitty. I am so proud of you for banning them from your theatre. They got what they deserved.
[deleted] ยท 6 points ยท Posted at 06:42:55 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
[deleted]
NotAnFed ยท 10 points ยท Posted at 10:58:22 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Bro... They're on Hangover 7 now. The babies getting married this time
that_looks_nifty ยท 44 points ยท Posted at 19:10:44 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Revenge is delicious.
๐๏ธ MisterBazadin ยท 78 points ยท Posted at 19:12:44 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
and in theatre 7!
haemaker ยท 6 points ยท Posted at 20:56:04 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Covered in "Golden Topping"
evoblade ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 22:36:36 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
At least they don't even claim it's butter.
brannana ยท 37 points ยท Posted at 21:18:43 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
When I ushered at the movie theater, we'd have kids trying to pull this all the time. Usually I'd just go to them and say, "look, I know you actually bought tickets to see 'X' and are sneaking in here. I'm fine as long as we aren't close to selling out the show, and you guys aren't causing problems. But if I get a complaint about you guys, I'm going to have to kick you out. Okay?"
๐๏ธ MisterBazadin ยท 80 points ยท Posted at 21:21:59 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I let others in as well, but usually those that seemed more well behaved and not so loud and obnoxious. After a while, you could get a sense of who they were. I still remember when Blade 2 came out there were these two guys, had to be like 12 and 13. They came up to me and politely asked me if they could go see Blade 2.
They worded it like "We have tickets for x, which we are more than happy to see. But, truth be told, we'd rather see Blade 2. We know we're underage, but we just wanted to ask."
They told me afterwards that Blade 2 was definitely worth seeing.
fudeldung ยท 26 points ยท Posted at 00:04:23 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Obligatory german here: we are told that fines for underage viewers (so below the age rating or below 18 after 12pm) may result in around 20kโฌ in fines for the cinema, which are at least in parts given over to the responsible usher, if he/she can be identified (small cinema, only 1 usher: you are going down). I hate so send kids away, but I would never voluntarily take the risk.
DantePD ยท 30 points ยท Posted at 03:53:20 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
MPAA ratings on films in the US are voluntary, so they're not subject to fines (Same with ESRB ratings for games.) The industries created the voluntary rating systems specifically to avoid the government creating a legally enforced system.
fudeldung ยท 9 points ยท Posted at 07:45:55 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Oh, okay. Here we have the youth protection act that mandates drinking age, how long a certain age group can go out and so on. It also mandates that there is to be a non governmental body (to prevent censorship) to rate all kinds of medias age restrictions, the ratings are not(!) negotiable. So far, so good. Then the media industry volunteered to create this body, and the fuckers called it "voluntary self regulation" (Freiwillige Selbstkontrolle, FSK). Now we have at least one idiot / day who thinks that the age ratings are voluntary and that he can take his 5 year old child into a FSK18 movie.
PM_ME_YOUR_DATSUN ยท -1 points ยท Posted at 16:47:00 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
A parent should be entitled to take their kid to any movie they want.
fudeldung ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 17:34:59 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
No, I dont think so. Lots of people are just to dumb to understand that some movies or scenes that do not trouble them, might be highly troubling for a child. Its the governments job to protect those kids from the dumb people they - unfortunately - have as parents.
PM_ME_YOUR_DATSUN ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 19:00:58 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
So the government should also make sure the same parents cant buy said movie in case they bring it home and let their kids watch it, right?
Just let the government control what we let our kids see, that's a great idea.
fudeldung ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 19:09:33 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
On the dvd is a label that specifically states the age rating. What parents do in their homecan not be controlled, but it is made sure that at least in public venues the childs interests are protected. Also, the labels act as a guidance towards the parents, as not all parents, especially the older ones, are familiar with every kind of media.
PM_ME_YOUR_DATSUN ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 20:11:08 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
and when you walk into a movie theater, the rating is always displayed next to the title.
They absolutely can choose not to walk into that film.
I fail to see your point.
Frond_Dishlock ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 09:50:51 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Oh man, that just reminded me of the very cool girl at the video store who rented my cousin, me, and some friends, Freddy's Dead, when we were allowed to go pick some films for his 12th or 13th birthday. She had a cheeky grin and winked at us over allowing us to rent it. Which being 12/13, impressed us immensely as you can imagine.
Travisx2112 ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 00:07:51 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
You're a bro.
LadyA052 ยท 35 points ยท Posted at 22:52:51 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Like the old lady who got stopped for speeding and told the cop there was a body in the trunk...he called for backup, they surrounded the car with guns, and opened the trunk to find...nothing. The old lady says, And I bet he's gonna say I was speeding, too!
PhoBueno ยท 25 points ยท Posted at 19:39:21 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Good story. It reminds me of this short film.
https://youtu.be/bVgtXgmZjV4
count_chockula ยท 36 points ยท Posted at 21:17:21 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Link to relevant part
๐๏ธ MisterBazadin ยท 8 points ยท Posted at 21:32:07 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Thanks for that! That's awesome
tOaDeR2005 ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 02:51:32 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
That's the funniest thing I've seen in a while.
Teaandfkncookies ยท 19 points ยท Posted at 20:41:02 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Omg!!! That is just brilliant! I'm giggling like an idiot at the thought of you chewing their tickets, and these tools just staring at you!
๐๏ธ MisterBazadin ยท 29 points ยท Posted at 20:49:40 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Cleaning up the spill sucked, but remembering their faces . . . mouths open and eyes wide like they couldn't believe this was real life . . . priceless.
mikeash ยท 38 points ยท Posted at 20:46:45 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
That is amazing. You win. I don't know what you win, but whatever it is, you win it.
๐๏ธ MisterBazadin ยท 42 points ยท Posted at 20:49:50 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I've always wanted to win something!
flirt77 ยท 15 points ยท Posted at 22:58:31 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
You did it!
Funky_Ducky ยท 13 points ยท Posted at 19:25:31 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
The lengths you went to are admirable.
schaf1db ยท 11 points ยท Posted at 22:49:11 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I worked in a theater for years as well and this gives me so much joy. Thank you for sharing and thanks for swallowing. ;)
๐๏ธ MisterBazadin ยท 7 points ยท Posted at 23:06:13 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
/bow
BrainArrow ยท 10 points ยท Posted at 00:03:01 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
The best part is that no one will ever believe their side of the story. Not then, and they'll definitely look stupid telling this story to anyone now
Bakkie ยท 25 points ยท Posted at 20:20:27 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
You realize that ER's all over America are going to see a rash of theater employees with paper cuts on their esophagus?
Cool.
๐๏ธ MisterBazadin ยท 66 points ยท Posted at 20:23:57 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I feel like this then would have the story come full circle as I work in a hospital now.
Bakkie ยท 10 points ยท Posted at 20:53:33 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Hah. if it wasn't a massive HIPAA breach, I'd love to see an image of the chest or abdominal scan with all the wads of paper balled up.
Anyone who has seen Book of Mormon will appreciate the visual.
thaeli ยท 16 points ยท Posted at 23:03:49 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
It's not a HIPPA breach if there's no identifying information on it :)
Bakkie ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 04:17:54 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Gutsy, gutsy.
PM_ME_YOUR_DATSUN ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 16:52:56 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Literally
nothing_showing ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 15:55:33 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
HIPAA
tangledThespian ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 12:42:00 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Have seen Book of Morman. Wouldn't really appreciate the visual because to match that little scene, the usher in question would have had to do.. Well. Something incredible. coughshovedthestubsuptheirasscough
Bakkie ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 13:05:47 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Let's see. How to put this.
The scene is set in Uganda. Medical facilities are primitive. One of the Elders has been proselytizing a particularly resistant group the leader of which threatens to shove the Book up his lower intestinal track. The scene plays out with the Elder in question crouched down like a puppy playing (forearms down, hips up)with an overhead projector acting as an x-ray machine showing internal placement of the book in the descending colon.
It is showstoppingly hilarious-they don't even bother with dialogue.
So a large mass of wadded up movie ticket swallowed really evokes the set piece.
tangledThespian ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 05:33:21 on December 13, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Yeah, General Buttfucking Naked shoved the book up Price's ass. Far different story, unless the ushers start shoving tickets up their asses.
..Also, didn't the doctor in that scene sing out what was happening? He did a parodied reprise of Price's whole 'something incredible' schtick, where he confirms that he did accomplish something incredible. Just not what he expected.
Bakkie ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 15:18:46 on December 13, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
The comment was more in refernce to what an x-ray looks like when a person has a large amount of paper in their digestive track whether it is the Book or a bunch of movie tickets like OP.
I can't remember if there was a song. I was laughing too hard and so was the rest of the audience.
Rob_T_Firefly ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 05:50:20 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
OP eats ornery patient's insurance card in 3.. 2..
Scottysmoosh ยท 16 points ยท Posted at 20:19:57 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Is the group of loud teenagers a common thing? I've never really experienced it before, but two times in the last couple months I've had some really bad experiences. Last week I had to yell at a group after listening to their bullshit for the first 45 minutes of a horror movie... Five other people trying politely shush'ing or asking them to be quiet. I had to give them a verbal smack down before they shut up.
๐๏ธ MisterBazadin ยท 25 points ยท Posted at 20:23:25 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
From working there it depends on the day and the time. Friday and Saturday nights around 7pm were usually the worst. 9pm and later would have some. It would also depend on the movie. I saw Krampus last Friday night at like 9:45 and there was a fairly large group of rabble-rousers that needed some coaxing to quiet down. If they're near me I usually tell them either they can pay for my movie or shut the fuck up.
jonomw ยท 17 points ยท Posted at 22:49:17 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
That actually sounds like a pretty effective way to shut up some loud moviegoers without sounding completely rude. Gotta remember that one.
[deleted] ยท 18 points ยท Posted at 02:47:52 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
About 20 minutes into a movie I tap the closest of two little 12 year old shits on the shoulder and say to him "shut the fuck up". They move two rows down and carry on. Woman in the row in front turns around...
"will you shut up?"
"we're just-"
"I don't give a shit. Shut up and be quiet".
So satisfying.
PM_ME_YOUR_CLACKER ยท 38 points ยท Posted at 18:48:50 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Bravo! I hope those tickets were ink on paper and not the thermal type. If you notice people who handle receipts wearing latex or neoprene gloves, it's for a good reason.
soggyfritter ยท 43 points ยท Posted at 19:31:23 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Oh noooo. I work with that paper all day long. Now I'm gonna die.
CA719 ยท 9 points ยท Posted at 23:34:07 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
rip in peace, friend ๐
YDOULIE ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 02:14:11 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
rip in pickles
LORDS810 ยท 12 points ยท Posted at 20:47:25 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)*
This has to be one of, if not the best story I've read on this sub. Great job! Who was ever going to believe them that you had eaten their tickets.
๐๏ธ MisterBazadin ยท 21 points ยท Posted at 20:50:57 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Exactly. If I ever see that manager again . . . I'm going to tell her
lyan-cat ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 00:30:28 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Please do! I'm sure she'll laugh her ass off.
[deleted] ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 01:34:38 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Did you ever admit what you did to them?
๐๏ธ MisterBazadin ยท 8 points ยท Posted at 01:41:02 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I never saw them again.
[deleted] ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 01:48:23 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I meant your manager. The next day did you tell your manager that the kids he banned were just assholes instead of thieves?
๐๏ธ MisterBazadin ยท 11 points ยท Posted at 01:50:25 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Oh . . . no. I didn't tell anyone about it.
_steven42_ ยท 6 points ยท Posted at 01:14:04 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
From an askreddit thread: " Waiting on line with friends to go into a rave. We were all tripping before we got in. The front door security was handing out little pieces of paper with disclaimers written on it, basically saying, 'drugs are prohibited, there is a zero tolerance, blah blah blah.' The guard is telling my friend to read it. My friend kept saying 'what?', and the security guard kept repeating, 'read it'. Eventually my friend shrugs and puts it in his mouth and eats it, thinking that's what the guy is telling him to do. The guy just shook his head and let us in. We get inside, histerically laughing at the situation/my still confused friend. It was great. " /u/hookp
soggyfritter ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 19:30:07 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Applause!
elislider ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 20:51:55 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Holy shit. You ate the tickets. Are you Bill Murray?
this is top level stuff. nicely done
๐๏ธ MisterBazadin ยท 6 points ยท Posted at 20:57:30 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Thank You
theacorneater ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 21:16:31 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Best story ever!
Drak_is_Right ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 21:50:35 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Amazing plot twist
[deleted] ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 21:51:09 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I worked in a movie theater; thank you so damn much for doing/posting this.
๐๏ธ MisterBazadin ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 22:02:14 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I'm glad you enjoyed it.
MuffDragon ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 21:57:09 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Oh my god. That is so awesome. Nice job dude.
typicaliconoclast ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 23:14:57 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I can just hear the manager.
"Ate them? Come on. You can come up with a better lie than that."
set616 ยท 6 points ยท Posted at 00:21:13 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I think this is the first one of these that I actually laughed out loud.
begrudged ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 22:27:49 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I don't think I've seen a better story on this sub.
I laughed. I cried. I slowly smoked a solitary cigarette, sullen.
Bwa-VO!
WantToSeeMyUvula ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 02:28:33 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
My hope is that one of those kids reads this story and posts the way it went down from their perspective. That had to be mind blowing to see the usher literally eat your tickets.
Shadow00188 ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 03:39:09 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Alpha as fuck
finallyinfinite ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 06:23:30 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I love in the TL;DR you so casually say "I ate the tickets"
Jangenzer0 ยท 7 points ยท Posted at 00:28:47 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Sounds like something Mac from Its Always Sunny In Philadelphia would do, love it!!
๐๏ธ MisterBazadin ยท 7 points ยท Posted at 00:32:37 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Someone commented with a link to the gif of Mac eating the paper
bridgeventriloquist ยท 9 points ยท Posted at 20:23:35 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I ate my friend's homework once in middle school (no reason really, I was just an awful little shit). I think it would have worked if I had finished it, but a half page of homework with several bite marks is pretty compelling evidence in this situation.
AgentMahou ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 00:05:45 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Not only did you get some excellent revenge, you also upped your fiber intake! Bonus!
Eriamjh1138 ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 01:18:04 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Eating the tickets was fantastic!
[deleted] ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 02:30:00 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
This is one of the funniest things I have read in a while. I would put that shit on my resume under other skills: Willing to eat the tickets of douchebags
firesoups ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 04:21:32 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
You ate their tickets oh my god I can't stop laughing ate the tickets lolol
My buddy works in a theater I can't wait to tell her about this
[deleted] ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 06:37:22 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
[deleted]
๐๏ธ MisterBazadin ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 11:34:20 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I never saw this. It's awesome!!!!
keepitsimple0626 ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 14:44:07 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Oh man, the looks on their faces must have been priceless! I can just imagine the conversation now. "MOM HE ATE OUR TICKETS!"
"why on earth would he do that?"
"Uhm...uh...grumble
Explosiveballs ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 17:14:45 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Serious question: what was your poop like?
๐๏ธ MisterBazadin ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 17:21:15 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
$15 worth of memories
thatdude16 ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 21:53:18 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I currently work in a movie theater, and you sir, are my hero.
๐๏ธ MisterBazadin ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 22:01:46 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I am glad I can serve as inspiration to those yet enslaved!
dcredpanda ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 22:39:12 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
You can only pull something like this once or you risk losing credibility. Love that you waited for the perfect moment! Slow clapping over here.
theonlybluecow ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 23:03:15 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
2 years I have been on reddit, this is by far the best thing I have ever read.
sageintheshadows ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 23:14:03 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
You are a straight bad ass sir, I snuck into my fair share of R rated movies underage, but if you had did what you did, I think I'd have to shake your hand. Haha
[deleted] ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 01:40:23 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Last time I went to a movie we had to get an employee because of noisy people (2 year old in avengers).
My boyfriend told me last movie he went to there were kids that snuck in and it was super obvious since they only sold like 8 tickets. The teenage employee tried to kick them out and they refused, he threatened to call the cops and they tried to call his bluff. My boyfriend is ex military and has anger issues, he threatened to remove them before the cops showed up. They left and he got a replacement voucher.
GloriousGardener ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 20:11:31 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Hilarious.
On the other hand it wasn't that good of a long term revenge because that story is way better than the movie, I bet they will tell that tale decades from now.
lII1IIlI1l1l1II ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 23:14:55 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Savage.
Fozzybear513 ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 23:24:37 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Revenge is a dish best served with tick stubs
saintjeremy ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 00:06:56 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Fucking A+ revenge. Holy shit!!
Xinicide ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 00:28:14 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
My friends and I use to sneak in all the time like this, buy tickets to a movie, walk into another one we actually wanted to see. Our idea was not really stealing since we paid for tickets. Probably did this over a dozen times. Only got caught once and it was because the movie we snuck into had like 4 people in it and we had a group of 5. So it was probably pretty obvious.
Though we didn't pour our drinks out on the floor when we got kicked out.
Stubrochill17 ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 01:16:10 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view3/20141103/5132736/mac-eats-contract-o.gif
Star90s ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 01:26:54 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
That would make a great scene in an 80"s Era teenage angst movie.
MrsPulseInstance ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 01:32:47 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
When I used to work at a theatre there were always teenagers who did stuff like this. Good on you for letting them have justice served. Justice tastes good!!!hahha
TheMysteriousMid ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 01:33:00 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
You just made my former Cast Member heart glow with glee.
For_Teh_Lurks ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 03:47:18 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
As someone who worked in a movie theater for 3 years, and have dealt with this type of group, this made my heart warm. Hats off to you, sir or madame, I would not have thought to do that.
BIGFO0OT ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 03:51:09 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
My favorite was giving people older popcorn (still not stale) when they'd ask for the "fresh stuff"
akbort ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 04:03:47 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
http://m.imgur.com/TLi4Dyj
I could only find shitty tumblr gifs so a picture will have to suffice.
Death_Pig ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 04:12:42 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Justice boner has landed.
2_Ducks_in_a_Handbag ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 06:38:27 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I love it!
chambertlo ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 12:17:03 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
You should receive a medal for the work that you did. If there were more people like you working at teh cinema, I would still be going to the movies 2-3 times a week. Those assholes oyu kicked out are reason I haven't seen a movie in months. Thank you for showing them what the fuck happens when you don't know how to act in public.
Raveynfyre ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 12:28:40 on December 13, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I got a guy almost kicked out for trying to video one of the Hobbit films on his camera phone, and it was in 3D.
I was really pissed off because the brightly lit screen was ruining what little enjoyment I was getting out of the film, and I walked up to the concession stand and said, "There's a guy filming the new Hobbit movie on his cell phone in here if anyone cares!"
Manager followed me and tried to take the guy out into the hall, he refused to get up, but at least he stopped filming.
It wasn't going to work anyway because the damn thing was in 3D to begin with, but don't fuck with my movie watching experience.
FoosYou ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 12:36:34 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Did not see that coming. 10/10 would read again.
Stoet ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 14:22:58 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Hey OP. The kids probably learned a lesson in not being obnoxious and I loved the revenge, but even for the kids, this is a great story. "You remember that time when Todd was a twat and the movie theatre clerk swallowed our tickets in spite?" Hilarious!
Lichewitz ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 14:39:30 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
This is the most hilarious revenge I ever read here. It's actually kinda inspiring. I can't wait to eat someone's something whenever I get the chance
aggravatingyou ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 14:44:22 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Who cleaned up the drink?
๐๏ธ MisterBazadin ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 14:46:41 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I did
queefiest ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 15:35:20 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I worked in theatres for 3 years as a x trained grunt, then 2 as a manager. This justice is all too beautiful.
[deleted] ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 16:17:49 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I picture you excreting the tickets, and they're perforated.
6368_39162 ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 16:50:23 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I once ate a school uniform infraction slip. The Deputy was so confused I got out of detention.
TheNilla ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 22:15:34 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Ok first, OP you're a hero, just brilliant but lets not forget a KEY point that OP got lucky with: If the kids were in person buying tickets and someone in the booth remembered, OR more common these days, a video was recorded of them buying tickets, OP would have had a very different ending to his revenge.
I would hate for any current theater workers to try this and have it backfire.
๐๏ธ MisterBazadin ยท 19 points ยท Posted at 23:05:38 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
It's also worth nothing that I was fully aware that there were no cameras where the ticket nomming occurred.
Rav99 ยท 6 points ยท Posted at 23:33:12 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I love that :)
TheNilla ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 03:26:58 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Lol, not that I meant at the box office to show evidence the kids bought tickets, you seem smart enough to not do something like that under a camera
Black_Handkerchief ยท 6 points ยท Posted at 22:29:54 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
He still wouldn't have gotten punished. Because seriously... what idiot eats a customers ticket?
The manager would write them off as teens who wanted to cause trouble for the employee who asked for their ticket that they lost.
TheNilla ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 03:27:52 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I dunno, are you saying as a manager you'd refute video evidence of these kids buying tickets in favor of your employee trying to kick them out for having no tickets?
Black_Handkerchief ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 03:57:04 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I am saying I'd refute the claim that my employee ate all their tickets, whilst believing those kids are irresponsible in looking after their tickets and are trying to get my employee fired for doing his job.
TheNilla ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 04:19:00 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Ok, I was talking about a different point, I agree with the manager from OP's story
raezin ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 05:14:31 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I managed a theater for years. If there was video of them purchasing tickets, whoever worked the box office would have gotten way more heat than the usher. I'd assume they had tickets to a different movie, whether or not they could produce them. Every single underage kid I ever caught would act like they lost their ticket and try to whine their way into that movie than be forced to watch Pooh's Heffalump Movie. Every. Single. Kid.
GuiltyStimPak ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 00:59:09 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Yes, this was a tailored moment. It wasn't some gambit that has any chance of working consistently.
cecilsaxon ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 03:15:24 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Loz-
ate 'em 'e did. I saw it with me own eyes Gov'nah! -- I recreated the scene with the teenagers as cockney street urchins.
BigBiker05 ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 23:35:17 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Bullshit, no one would drop a $20 soda on purpose.
rokss8 ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 01:39:31 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
No, it was 4 years ago so they were only $17
Raveynfyre ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 12:30:34 on December 13, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
If their mother handed them the money to get the concessions then they don't care, because it wasn't their money.
Lamenardo ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 00:24:33 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Ah, the Trunchball Principle. Nice.
thatradslang ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 00:26:49 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Was this at a 2nd run movie theater?
[deleted] ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 01:48:49 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I enjoy sneaking from one movie into another...I'm 33.
Overthinks_Questions ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 02:05:58 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Yes. Magnificent.
lyth ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 02:35:51 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)*
I have the greatest sense of deja vu here. Have you told this one on here before?
I swear I've read something almost exactly like this before.
Edit- found it, below. Not exactly the same story but close.
cathillian ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 04:07:41 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Only 15 and have to be 17 to watch R rated movie? Work at theatre and go on "break" sit in R rated movie and bam! Free boobies.
Vinay92 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 04:36:29 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Fucking epic.
CrustyTowel ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 06:25:09 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I've seen this story before...
stillphat ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 06:29:25 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Classic mac
Fashbinder_pwn ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 07:55:29 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
People are the main reason I don't go to the cinema anymore.
Philanthropiss ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 13:07:33 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Wait....you ate their tickets?
preventDefault ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 14:01:52 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
That genius probably spent $7 for that soda, and another $10 for the movie. Perfect.
JUST_LOGGED_IN ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 17:33:27 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
So do you have any stories about people getting trashed with booze they sneak in? I'm pretty low key so no one ever said anything to me when I did it.
[deleted] ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 18:09:45 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Unf, delicious.
Whinito ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 18:17:19 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
This is great! Did you tell your manager what really happened. If not, how do you think he would've reacted?
NightMgr ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 23:29:13 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I suppose another tack would have been to call security and the police for intentional vandalism as well as theft. They didn't pay for that movie, and going in was illegal.
They can call mommy from jail.
JohnnySkidmarx ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 00:27:59 on December 13, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
So how'd the tickets taste?
ApocAngel87 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 02:10:08 on December 13, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I imagine like sweet, sweet justice.
CIearMind ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 22:09:26 on February 6, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Where's the post?
culesamericano ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 23:06:17 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
dude...u ATE the tickets?
MisanthropicAltruist ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 00:46:46 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
So amazing! Was there a slow clap from the other people in the theater?
Divine2012 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 02:42:10 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I wish I was a fly on the wall for that one.
Nder_Wiggin ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 03:13:29 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
That's good, but I was thinking"eat the tickets"? I would have just ripped the tickets into little pieces of paper than threw them in the trash right in front of them. If they say," he threw away our tickets and put them in the trash", I would have said," ok prove it. Go trash diving." Why risk constipation for revenge.
chinchillazilla54 ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 03:41:25 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Because that story is believable. No one would ever believe that OP ate all their tickets.
DrakeSucks ยท -3 points ยท Posted at 02:59:49 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Eh, Idk man, to me it sounds like you were just being a hall monitor, however you did happen to stumble upon a real dickhead. I'm torn on this one. Hilarious that you ate the tickets though.
๐๏ธ MisterBazadin ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 03:01:20 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
To be fair, the group was being quite loud and obnoxious in the lobby.
DrakeSucks ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 03:37:07 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
well then FUCK EM!
civilian11214 ยท -2 points ยท Posted at 07:21:42 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I don't buy it. Good try/10. I worked in a movie theatre.
GarciaJones ยท -14 points ยท Posted at 23:23:25 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I was actually beaten up by my high school bully during the premier of 8 mile.
Small suburb on Long Island , NY.
They had shows at 9, 915, 945 and so on.
I had to see the 915 didn't I?
I loved the film. I was 14, in love with all eminent music, "The Eminem Show "just recently dropped. It was a blast.
I had a bully named "Jon" and in school that day, he threatens to kill me.
I told him that he better watch out because I had knives in my bag and I would stab him if needed.
Well now, I'm not a sociopath but this kid had me up against the wall... I wanted to sound dangerous .
9/11 was still very recent and he told the principal who immediately called me down to his office.
There, a cop was waiting and searched me.
When they found nothing they asked me why. I told them that I lied to be more dangerous and I guess then got it. The threat was taken seriously though and bullying was another issue our school had no tolerance for . We both got suspended. Mine was in school and his was out of school.
That was a bad day but 8 mile was coming out! I convinced my grandmother to buy me a ticket and sign a permission slip for the film (I was living with her back then ). If you don't remember seeing it in the theatre for the first time , let me tell you, it was damn amazing.
I stayed for the end credits. Lose yourself was out a few weeks and my social studies teacher always made me rap it for the class whenever I forgot my homework. He always used to remind me that in life I only have " one shot " and man that shit stuck .
When the music played, I stayed and rapped Los Yourself and was all smirky and shit. It was awesome.
I heard some kids in the back but ignored them. My fucking Jam was on!
When it was over, I get up to leave and now realize that the kids behind me were that of my bully ......
And all his friends who also hated me.
They encircled me , surrounding me and proceeded to take turns beating me harder and harder with each punch.
The credits were rolling and it was late so everyone had gone and this was just going down and no one was there to witness this.
At the end , I was bloody, damn near blind, but I just laughed. Fuck them is what I was thinking and if they think I'm weird in school, they're going to think I'm weird when I get my ass whooped. I just giggled and laugh and pointed to each one of them like you do when you kick another teams ass in Halo. Yeah, that kind of mocking.
They all seemed like " wtf is with this kid ?"
As they turned to leave, two cops had just shown up and screamed freeze. Apparently an old lady saw what was going on and with this being a " rap" movie , the police figured fights would break out in the parking lot.
Close.
It was funny. I was allowed to file restraining orders on all of them as well as them all getting expelled from school. I stayed in the hospital for a few days and let me tell you, when they left me , I cried. I fucking cried it hurt bad.
All I remember after that was , one of the employees telling me , they didn't even have tickets. They snuck in and on 3 screens with like , 6 different showings, I had to have picked the one screen and one time that they were there .
Ironic watching that movie, seeing Eminem get his ass kicked and not knowing that in about 25 minutes I was about to go through the same thing.
I feel if I ever meet him, this is the story to tell him.
That I (TL;DR) went to see 8 mile and out of all the showings, I go to the one that when the film ended, my high school bullies were waiting behind me and beat my ass so bad I ended up in the hospital. They got suspended and fuck them.
lex99 ยท -8 points ยท Posted at 03:14:21 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I don't know... sounds like you just cock-blocked a fun evening for them. Couldn't you just be cool and let them in, but kick them out if they were actually loud and bothering people?
AntonChigursCoin ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 11:29:46 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Found the teenager
macsenscam ยท -34 points ยท Posted at 22:11:37 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
You are a douche, they just wanted to watch a movie.
๐๏ธ MisterBazadin ยท 22 points ยท Posted at 23:07:19 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Ah, the drink spiller I presume. At last we meet again!
[deleted] ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 02:31:26 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Don't let that douche get you down. Be free and eat the tickets of the douchebags of the world.
MuffinMan4Lyfe ยท 17 points ยท Posted at 22:50:11 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
The second they "slipped" and the drink was spilled, fuck them. They knew the rules, they disobeyed, they were disrespectful and snotty, then got what was coming. I'm 100% sure you are just some snotty kid who's mad they also didn't get into the R-Rated theatre.
macsenscam ยท -20 points ยท Posted at 00:59:25 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
The second he asked for stubs (which wasn't his job) he was being a dick. I used to work at a theater and it always annoyed me that certain employees would go out of their way to ruin teens evening just for a power-trip.
MuffinMan4Lyfe ยท 11 points ยท Posted at 01:52:51 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Teens doing what aren't supposed to be doing, and they know this. It IS his job to ensure the Theatres protocol is enforced. And when they were confronted, they made an ass of themselves when they simply could have turned and left. They got what they deserved.
macsenscam ยท -12 points ยท Posted at 01:58:09 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
If you are a stub collector then it is your job because you know what tickets they have, but if you are a cleaner it's not since you wouldn't know what tickets they had. Theaters don't want every random cleaner harassing customers for some self-righteous bullshit.
Sure, but that doesn't mean he wasn't also being a dick.
MuffinMan4Lyfe ยท 12 points ยท Posted at 02:01:49 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
If he knows that someone was acting against the rules, it is his job to act. He wasn't being a dick for explicitly following rules until the children treated him without respect.
macsenscam ยท -11 points ยท Posted at 02:13:38 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
First of all, it is not his job (as someone who had that job). Secondly, how could he have known?
MuffinMan4Lyfe ยท 8 points ยท Posted at 02:27:50 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
He saw them being suspicious and was correct as said in the post.
macsenscam ยท -3 points ยท Posted at 03:09:40 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
How is using the bathroom before a movie suspicious?
MuffinMan4Lyfe ยท 6 points ยท Posted at 05:10:43 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Because it is a common technique that use to draw attention away from them, but now it is well known and drew attention to them. They also all happened to just need the bathroom at the exact same time? And does it even matter? It's done. He knew what they were doing, and he stopped it.
macsenscam ยท -1 points ยท Posted at 13:27:25 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
You're insane, everyone uses the bathroom before they go into a movie: it's just common sense. And yes it does matter, he was profiling customers who had done nothing wrong and who he had no reason to suspect therefore being a total douche and failing at his job.
๐๏ธ MisterBazadin ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 17:11:39 on December 12, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Okay, a few things I'll mention: a) it was part of my job to make sure others weren't sneaking in to movies they weren't supposed to as the ushers were really the only employees that worked in the actual hallways of the theatre. Everyone else was in the front, and the ticket pole person had to stay at his station.
b.) they were also being loud and obnoxious in the lobby and on their way down. The didn't just casually walk in the bathroom, they more or less ran in there, drawing attention to themselves
c.) I didn't like kicking people out. I did it if a manager told me to work the door, if someone way too young was trying to go in, or if the people trying to sneak in would more likely than not be loud and disruptive to the other guests that were there. This group of teenagers were the latter.
d.) if I did kick someone out, I let them go see whatever movie they had tickets for, or one that they were of age to see. They paid their money, they got a movie. When these guys were caught, I told them they could go to whatever other movie they were supposed to see, and thats when the ahole spilled the drink on purpose.
You can think I am a douche on a power trip all that you want. I have no regrets for what I did.
Cheers
Downvote_me_plsssss ยท -18 points ยท Posted at 23:26:37 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
I'd have beat your ass for being a prick
ichosethis ยท -14 points ยท Posted at 21:44:42 on December 11, 2015 ยท (Permalink)
Former theatre/rental store employee. My job came with free soda, popcorn, and movies. I still hate paying for any of that and it's been over 5 years. It should be free, I'll get a manager pass for another town (actually got in without the pass once, was willing to pay cuz it was last minute decision to go but the guy recognized that is used passes before and knew my manager).