๐๏ธ Mango123456 ยท 118 points ยท Posted at 19:31:20 on February 4, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
The Card Member Services scammers are upping their game. This guy barely had a trace of an accent, and had an extremely convincing - if inaccurate - pitch. But then things took a turn early on when he claimed that his father left when he was one, and his mother was in a fatal car accident when he was two. Damn.
My favourite moment of the call was when Roy MacKenzie perhaps had a suspicion that Lenny was a bot. I liked it so much I had to back up and listen to it again.
Roy MacKenzie: "...please answer me in a simple 'yes'."
Lenny: "Yes, yes, yes..."
This happened THREE TIMES. I'm pretty sure [I looked like THIS](http://i.imgur.com/W6wWGwp.gif) after the second time. [This was me](http://i.imgur.com/26JaOMF.gif) after the third time.
...
Roy MacKenzie: "In our generation, sir, in this time, even college dropouts are millionaires. It's not that big of a deal if you go to college."
Roy MacKenzie: "CREDIT CARDS! Do you have any credit cards!? Charge cards...the cards made out of plastic that has magic money inside it!"
Lenny: "...in family, you know, these things are--are quite important, you know..."
Roy MacKenzie: "They're NOT important, sir! They're of no importance to me! Family don't mean shit to me! We're only meet because in funerals and weddings! Other than that, we don't meet. At all. So, besides family, what else can you talk about?"
At this point, Roy MacKenzie started getting really, **really** rude with Lenny. I'm not going to transcribe this portion of the call. Listen at your peril.
๐๏ธ Mango123456 ยท 41 points ยท Posted at 19:31:24 on February 4, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Follow Lenny on Twitter!
The Card Member Services scammers are upping their game. This guy barely had a trace of an accent, and had an extremely convincing - if inaccurate - pitch. But then things took a turn early on when he claimed that his father left when he was one, and his mother was in a fatal car accident when he was two. Damn.
My favourite moment of the call was when Roy MacKenzie perhaps had a suspicion that Lenny was a bot. I liked it so much I had to back up and listen to it again.
Roy MacKenzie: "...please answer me in a simple 'yes'."
Lenny: "Yes, yes, yes..."
This happened THREE TIMES. I'm pretty sure I looked like THIS after the second time. This was me after the third time.
...
Roy MacKenzie: "In our generation, sir, in this time, even college dropouts are millionaires. It's not that big of a deal if you go to college."
...
Roy MacKenzie: "CREDIT CARDS! Do you have any credit cards!? Charge cards...the cards made out of plastic that has magic money inside it!"
...
Lenny: "...in family, you know, these things are--are quite important, you know..."
Roy MacKenzie: "They're NOT important, sir! They're of no importance to me! Family don't mean shit to me! We're only meet because in funerals and weddings! Other than that, we don't meet. At all. So, besides family, what else can you talk about?"
At this point, Roy MacKenzie started getting really, really rude with Lenny. I'm not going to transcribe this portion of the call. Listen at your peril.
fericyde ยท 25 points ยท Posted at 21:19:17 on February 4, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
G-d dammit -- she passed with DISTINCTIONS! What part of that does this moron not understand!?!?
zebozebo ยท 8 points ยท Posted at 20:03:16 on February 5, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
aw man feel bad for this telemarketer. didn't develop the tools to cope with his emotions, it seems like. Sad about his upbringing, started out facing incredible obstacles.
Crespyl ยท 7 points ยท Posted at 01:22:22 on May 4, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
You're assuming he's telling the truth.
fortisle ยท 10 points ยท Posted at 01:08:09 on March 24, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I don't feel bad for him... he took a job scamming people
[deleted] ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 21:26:32 on February 8, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
[deleted]
๐๏ธ Mango123456 ยท 7 points ยท Posted at 00:29:09 on February 9, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
No randomness, no AI. Whoever wrote Lenny's dialog is just that good.
clunkclunk ยท 33 points ยท Posted at 19:40:59 on February 4, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
"Do you have your cards with you?"
"Well, with the world finances..."
Perfect timing.
[deleted] ยท 30 points ยท Posted at 20:52:54 on February 4, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
[deleted]
๐๏ธ Mango123456 ยท 15 points ยท Posted at 21:19:36 on February 4, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Beautiful, wasn't it?
Biks ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 01:16:25 on February 5, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I was rotfl
clunkclunk ยท 13 points ยท Posted at 19:47:37 on February 4, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
oh shit, he got to the ducks twice.
manghoti ยท 17 points ยท Posted at 20:04:58 on February 4, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
oh my god this one is out of control. Some of lenny's best work, no question.
fericyde ยท 17 points ยท Posted at 01:14:20 on February 5, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
We have a two-ducker on our hands -- I can understand running through to the ducks once -- but TWICE! Priceless!
theyrestillnorth ยท 14 points ยท Posted at 23:02:04 on February 4, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
God I love Lenny. Too bad I can't auto forward my phone calls to him. These jerks have been calling all hours for the last couple of weeks. I've resorted to answering like I'm the local sheriff's office. That usually gets them to hang up right away. Not sure what the deal is, but there seems to be a recent uptick in these calls. I'm worried about my older family who are too polite to deal with these scum appropriately. ๐
๐๏ธ Mango123456 ยท 9 points ยท Posted at 23:51:07 on February 4, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
You're not the first to have mentioned this. The past week or two has been crazy.
Quietus42 ยท 8 points ยท Posted at 07:29:23 on February 7, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
The only effective thing you can do after reporting them is to waste their time.
That's what Lenny does. And this costs the company money.
If you can't run a bot, the next best thing is to keep them on hold for as long as possible.
Reps are trained to end the call after about a minute on hold (though typically more like 30 seconds in my experience).
That's makes holding and forgetting ineffective.
You have to put them in a hold loop.
Please hold. Wait thirty seconds. Hello? Sorry. Oh wait, please hold. wait thirty seconds. Sorry, who are you calling for? Okay please hold. Wait thirty seconds Sorry, they're just finishing with the monkey, please hold. wait thirty seconds. Sorry, the monkey pooped everywhere. You know how it is. Please hold. wait. Sorry, they're almost done. Just washing off the blood. Please hold. wait Sorry, okay here they are.. Wait, my Bokor just got here with the goat, please hold. wait Sorry, they want to know who's calling, again?...
Have fun, get weird, and most importantly: waste their time.
sacrabos ยท 9 points ยท Posted at 02:17:04 on February 5, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Wow, this has to be one of the best Lenny's yet. How many times did they guy ask to answer in the simple yes/no, and right on queue "yes, yes, yes..."
"The cards made out of plastic that has magic money inside it!"
I'm going to be snickering to myself for a while...
DudeNiceMARMOT ยท 10 points ยท Posted at 03:33:21 on February 5, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Lol this guy is beyond angry and so annoyed! I can just imagine this guy making violent hand gestures and flipping off his phone in his cubicle lol. This is some of Lenny's greatest work.
Biks ยท 7 points ยท Posted at 01:15:52 on February 5, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
We have double duckage!
merricat_blackwood ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 01:35:19 on February 5, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I listen to every single Lenny call religiously because they make me happy but this is the first one that had me laughing my ass off. What an asshole!
catharticwhoosh ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 02:01:30 on February 5, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Absolute best yet!
๐๏ธ Mango123456 ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 02:29:34 on February 5, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
To the anonymous Redditor who gilded this post: you seriously rock!
vicious_armbar ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 03:32:20 on March 17, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Slight Brazilian accent. Charismatic and confident. He's just talking gibberish, but he would be able to fool an old gullible retiree.
thefinn93 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 22:11:20 on February 4, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Every now and again when I see one of these I go try to set one up, and end up going down a rabbit hole of broken forum links and references to (apparently defunkt) itslenny.com. Anyone have infoz for setting it up on FreeSWITCH?
๐๏ธ Mango123456 ยท 16 points ยท Posted at 22:39:46 on February 4, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Send me your phone number (so I can whitelist it) and I'll send you further details.
thefinn93 ยท -7 points ยท Posted at 22:50:40 on February 4, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
My phone number? Can't you just post the configuration, code and recordings used? I don't want "Lenny As A Service"...
๐๏ธ Mango123456 ยท 16 points ยท Posted at 23:52:11 on February 4, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Sorry, I can't help then. Good luck!
thefinn93 ยท -10 points ยท Posted at 23:52:52 on February 4, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Why not post the stuff? Do you have some reason to keep it private?
๐๏ธ Mango123456 ยท 19 points ยท Posted at 23:57:31 on February 4, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Unfortunately yes. Lenny gets abused a lot for prank calls to innocent people. If I run it as a service, I have some control over it and can keep misuse to a minimum.
I also don't know FreeSWITCH, so couldn't help you even if I wanted to. There is nothing stopping you from DIYing it - but it's much easier to forward your calls to me ;)
thefinn93 ยท -11 points ยท Posted at 23:59:05 on February 4, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
That's the dumbest non-reason I've ever heard. Someone was kind enough to PM me the info.
๐๏ธ Mango123456 ยท 21 points ยท Posted at 00:05:28 on February 5, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Well shit, since you put it that way I'm going to drop everything, go learn FreeSWITCH, completely rewrite all my code, and send it to you along with a detailed tutorial. I'll try not to be longer than 45 minutes.
thefinn93 ยท -5 points ยท Posted at 00:07:28 on February 5, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
The FreeSWITCH part I get, no problem. The unwillingness to share the sound files, which are obviously the same for both, is what I take issue with
๐๏ธ Mango123456 ยท 20 points ยท Posted at 00:07:54 on February 5, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Well, I will try to go on.
Realtrain ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 02:38:47 on July 26, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
After seeing this conversation, I feel like we really need a a Lenny Reddit bot.
๐๏ธ Mango123456 ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 02:42:15 on July 26, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Made me smile ;)