๐๏ธ GayMormonDad ยท 110 points ยท Posted at 03:20:34 on July 18, 2018 ยท (Permalink)
I guess that nosy Mormon was a big fan of Saturday's Warrior.
Presumably, I volunteered to come the earth as a gay man so I could earn some eternal extra credit by keeping my mouth shut and pretending to be straight and delight some. In my experience, Mormons hate it when you go off script.
I didn't even know that pre-mortal agreements were even a thing, its bad enough that they try to shame grown people about covenants that they made when they were eight years old.
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monomo42 ยท 37 points ยท Posted at 03:31:01 on July 18, 2018 ยท (Permalink)
Just tell that person that โThe veil is very close for me. Iโve experienced what it said in my patriarchal blessing. Iโve clearly seen the promises that I made and now I am finally fully living in accordance to those covenants.โ
Itโs all made up, so use it against them...
ImaginaryConcern ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 13:12:51 on July 18, 2018 ยท (Permalink)
Ask them to show you that agreement IN WRITING.
ericstrow456 ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 23:50:50 on August 13, 2018 ยท (Permalink)
Made me lol ๐๐
Imagine their face if you said this!
ImaginaryConcern ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 15:10:06 on August 16, 2018 ยท (Permalink)
Imagine their face if you said, "show it to me IN WRITING, Mark Hoffman!"
daveescaped ยท 17 points ยท Posted at 05:37:19 on July 18, 2018 ยท (Permalink)
I had a crazy mission companion (who didn't) that had a pet theory identical to this. I was a convert. He said I volunteered to be born outside the faith because I knew I would find the faith regardless of where I was. And he said I would receive even greater blessings because if it. So I said, "So it's like Olympic diving and some dives have a greater degree of difficulty? And I decided to really go for it and do a Triple Lindy?". "That's it exactly!", he said having no idea I was making fun of him. I added that this must mean I sat in the presence of an almighty God and was so prideful that I wanted my earthly sojourn to provide extra challenge so I could beat other people in a contest of righteousness. He didn't get it.
He also fully believed that we each chose our parents and children. I asked how on earth that could possibly work? What if they chose us but we chose Brad Pitt and Angelina? What if everyone chose Gordon B Hinckley? What if ....
I don't think people in the heart of hearts actually believe such nonsense. I think it is a bit like wanting to believe in Middle Earth. Ultimately you know it ain't so but you love the fantasy too much.
Taurus-Littrow ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 14:22:46 on July 18, 2018 ยท (Permalink)
I can see a convert coming up with this as they are usually treated as second class to BIC members no matter what they do.
rth1027 ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 15:26:09 on July 18, 2018 ยท (Permalink)
Totally. We as humans invent what we need. Can't explain something - invent God, god, gods, great spirit, mythology... Saturdays warrior....
My buddy was in this that is crap mentality then he had a daughter attempt suicide and another get molested and now in his head he lapped up the SW story presented a bit differently by a neighbor but really its the same different packaging.
Bummer it didn't break his shelf. I get it though, it can freak you out to almost loose a child and still have a child in distress that you will grab onto anything that floats by in the water.
Slow_the_Fuck_Down ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 16:07:33 on July 18, 2018 ยท (Permalink)
Upvote for the Triple Lindy reference. If you try it at home, don't forget the armpit farts and checking wind speed and direction. lol
Chino-Blanco ยท 17 points ยท Posted at 05:31:09 on July 18, 2018 ยท (Permalink)
u/GayMormonDad you also promised to give me โฌ20,000 in the preexistence. Itโs time for you to honor your commitments.
ImaginaryConcern ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 13:13:36 on July 18, 2018 ยท (Permalink)
Love it!
THAT should shut them up!
ephemerally-eternal ยท 14 points ยท Posted at 04:16:29 on July 18, 2018 ยท (Permalink)
"But Jimmy! You promised!"
alicenotinwonder2 ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 04:37:51 on July 18, 2018 ยท (Permalink)
Hahahahahah!! Omg. What a fucking show lol.
Slow_the_Fuck_Down ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 16:10:27 on July 18, 2018 ยท (Permalink)
HaHaHa. I actually played Jimmy in the New Orleans stake production of Saturday's Warrior in the late 70s. Thought it was such a great missionary opportunity when I was 17-years-old and completely brainwashed. What a farce.
๐๏ธ GayMormonDad ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 21:56:38 on July 18, 2018 ยท (Permalink)
When people talk about the pre-existence, I always think of poor Jimmy.
Antagnostic ยท 11 points ยท Posted at 04:02:29 on July 18, 2018 ยท (Permalink)
What is the point of free will if we all took it away from ourselves with promises? That concept cheapens the value of free will.
hyrle ยท 10 points ยท Posted at 03:24:33 on July 18, 2018 ยท (Permalink)
"As far as I know, I never existed before I was born, and neither did you."
ConchaBullosa ยท 7 points ยท Posted at 04:17:38 on July 18, 2018 ยท (Permalink)
Iโd say that youโre looking for the man you covenanted to marry in the pre-existence, and does she have any brothers.
hotexmogirl ยท 6 points ยท Posted at 04:03:19 on July 18, 2018 ยท (Permalink)
"I know right? That and those promises I made when I was 7 to Santa Clause that I would actually be good...........I'm pretty much screwed"
Nights_Squatch ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 05:17:01 on July 18, 2018 ยท (Permalink)
I feel prompted to tell that guy to fuck right off
Bishop-Stan ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 04:48:13 on July 18, 2018 ยท (Permalink)
Thatโs right. I promised in the pre-existence not to give you a black eye. Iโm just about to go back on that promise.
aPinkFloyd ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 13:33:14 on July 18, 2018 ยท (Permalink)
Yup, we all agreed to believe THIS BULLSHIT
[1][1]
I don't believe...
seagulljaap ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 21:18:12 on July 18, 2018 ยท (Permalink)
lol. Promising to be gay to earn super extra special brownie points in Mormon heaven?
I'll take vodka, coffee, and gay sex for two plz.
R_Liz ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 05:15:29 on July 18, 2018 ยท (Permalink)
Tell them you don't believe in that crap anymore.
Sansabina ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 13:46:17 on July 18, 2018 ยท (Permalink)
the church has enough trouble already working out what is actual doctrine based on the scriptures and direct prophetic quotes without resorting to church-fan musicals as a source of theology.
Taurus-Littrow ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 14:20:57 on July 18, 2018 ยท (Permalink)
"straight and delightsome" Nice. :-)
InUtahNotOfUtah ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 15:02:43 on July 18, 2018 ยท (Permalink)
I've had this happen, as well. The best response is "Well I made that mistake once before, I won't be repeating it again."
BasicTruths ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 18:13:38 on July 18, 2018 ยท (Permalink)
LOL โค๏ธ๐๐๐๐