๐๏ธ spacecatapult ยท 17403 points ยท Posted at 17:47:44 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I've told her not to get her hopes up. "After all," I say, "we're only going to be celebrating it for half a minute." When she asked what in the world I was talking about, I pointed out, "This is your thirty-second birthday."
For the life of me, I can't figure why doesn't think this is hilarious. I keep making sure to remind her of it every time we are around new people. Hopefully if she hears the joke enough she will start to appreciate it.
๐๏ธ spacecatapult ยท 5125 points ยท Posted at 18:12:50 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)*
Every time I repeat this, she grows increasingly less patient, sometimes telling me to "just stop" before I even get to the punchline. Last night at dinner with our friends her reaction included the assessment "My dad is probably the only other person who would find that funny." Success!
Edit: typo
HeWhoCouldBeNamed ยท 1288 points ยท Posted at 19:20:05 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
You are a worthy son-in-law.
KTFOAces ยท 308 points ยท Posted at 22:51:27 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 4 years "thirty second birthday"
_Random_Username_ ยท 95 points ยท Posted at 23:11:12 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 10 years
TheViciousWolf ยท 281 points ยท Posted at 23:13:45 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 50 years "thirty second birthday"
youngkimosabe ยท 116 points ยท Posted at 23:20:16 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
You're gonna be so old
TheViciousWolf ยท 100 points ยท Posted at 00:32:17 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 49 years 11 months 30 days "don't forget to use Reddit"
mrpodo ยท 17 points ยท Posted at 02:43:46 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 49 years 11 months 29 days 10 hours 30 minutes 27 seconds
trace_jax3 ยท 6 points ยท Posted at 05:07:38 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 4 years 7 months "thirty second birthday"
intragroove ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 05:41:10 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 9 months "thirty second birthday"
Theryannn ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 15:04:08 on July 20, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 12 years "you better not be a fag by 32"
SonneeD ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 09:06:10 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 12 years 4 months 6 days "thirty second birthday"
Rosebudteg ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 11:10:51 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 7 years "thirty 'second' birthday"
Animactus ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 11:59:35 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 11 years 9 months ''thirty second birthday''
repeatsrs ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 23:03:45 on July 30, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 1 day "thirty second birthday"
regalrecaller ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 04:36:54 on October 10, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 3 years 20 days "thirty-second birthday"
dannycoll ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 08:15:36 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Wait what are we to remind you of?
toeofcamell ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 05:10:18 on September 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 60 years. Take your memory pills!
AlphaOkamii ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 07:46:17 on November 24, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 11 years 4 months
wonderful_wonton ยท 21 points ยท Posted at 01:23:33 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
What are you talking about? Thanks to OP I can be 31 for the rest of my life.
Q: How old are you?
A: I'm a few weeks away from my thirty-second birthday!
Thomasmm ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 12:29:54 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 14 years "thirty 'second' Birthday"
slap-and-pop ยท 16 points ยท Posted at 23:28:30 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 17 years and 3 months "declare national wear a condom day"
Mattnorden ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 23:36:41 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 10 years
Mattnorden ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 23:38:56 on July 25, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 6 months (I'm an idiot. 22nd birthday would also work for this)
Janwinaw ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 02:50:26 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I think he's gonna have children in 18 years time and by the time his kid is 32 he can use this joke
ismtrn ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 23:36:58 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
If your thirty second birthday is in 50 years, your twenty second birthday will be in 40 years. You should set a RemindMe for that too.
Rob_1089 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 03:57:06 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
And in 30 years, it will be his twelfth birthday! He needs to be reminded of that too!
benderisgreat356789 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 01:27:02 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 50 years One second "thirty second birthday"
GreenTNT ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 03:56:26 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 4 days, 7 hours, 3 minutes, 59 seconds
hendawg98 ยท 8 points ยท Posted at 23:52:07 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
So you just had your twenty second birthday not too long ago. 10 years and you'll get another 10 seconds on your special day
_Random_Username_ ยท 6 points ยท Posted at 23:59:02 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Wow, never even thought of that actually!
devonface ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 04:13:10 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
In 10 years you will be saying wow I can't believe I found that funny, and also I can't believe I voted for Trump's 3rd term.
PhoneySoprano ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 23:16:25 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 15 years
RogerSmith123456 ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 23:24:11 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 2.23475 minutes
_Random_Username_ ยท 6 points ยท Posted at 23:34:28 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Did you have a good thirty second birthday?
RogerSmith123456 ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 00:20:18 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
It was great although actually it was 5.4689 years ago. Thanks for asking.
zyphrinel ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 23:56:54 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemimdMe! 30 seconds "am I doing this right?"
RogerSmith123456 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 00:21:02 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
How was your birthday?
Artistbma ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 23:38:08 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 16 years and 2 months "thirty second birthday"
potatman ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 01:13:42 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Wouldn't it be easier to just round down and set the reminder for 4 years? What's the extra half minute on the reminder going to buy you?
dannycoll ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 08:53:57 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
A lot can happen in 30 seconds
Purtle ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 01:42:42 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 9 years
MickeyLALA ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 02:16:06 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 14 years
anarcist69 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 02:36:57 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 4 years "thirty second birthday"
HanMaBoogie ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 02:37:06 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 9 years ago
daniand17 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 02:44:58 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! Wifes 32 birthday is her thirty second birthday.
Shashank_Sharma ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 04:39:13 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 1 year
[deleted] ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 07:15:09 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Remindme! 2 years "thirty second birthday"
Peevesie ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 08:11:17 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Remindme! 2 years 6 months 29 days "30 second birthday"
ThatIckyGuy ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 11:14:28 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Remindme! February 25, 2017
ArchangelFuhkEsarhes ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 11:22:08 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 12 years
wipqozn ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 14:37:04 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 5 years "thirty second birthday"
Jorask ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 10:23:30 on August 3, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 10 years "don't forget to make your girlfriend mad with the 32 birthday joke"
[deleted] ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 16:13:32 on August 8, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 22 months
Mentally_Insane ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 01:09:18 on September 11, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Remind me! 6 years "32nd birthday"
machingunwhhore ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 23:36:30 on November 12, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 14 years "thirty second birthday"
payne_train ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 23:33:47 on January 13, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 5 years "thirty second birthday"
KryptoniteHurts ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 00:06:33 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Remindme! 8 years
Frank_Thunderwood ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 00:21:09 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Remindme! 4 years "Thirty second birthday"
landontbr ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 01:01:51 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 15 years "Thirty Second Birthday"
[deleted] ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 01:30:39 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
heir to the dad throne
EiffelPower ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 06:14:26 on August 4, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 26 years "thirty second birthday"
atle95 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 01:51:15 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 12 years "thirty second birthday"
yungsad ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 01:53:46 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
remindme! January 26 2019
Thalmazor ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 23:43:12 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Remindme! 12 years 5 months
ericbm2 ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 00:31:12 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 9 years 1 month "Thirty second birthday"
nofate301 ยท 142 points ยท Posted at 20:48:05 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
My wife had her 32nd birthday last year, I wish I could have had this thought.
[deleted] ยท 265 points ยท Posted at 22:36:33 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
[removed]
ArchAngelofSloths ยท 161 points ยท Posted at 22:42:46 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Wait what
[deleted] ยท 210 points ยท Posted at 22:48:11 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
[removed]
anzallos ยท 65 points ยท Posted at 23:03:34 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Out of curiosity, have you had your 32nd birthday yet?
[deleted] ยท 142 points ยท Posted at 23:16:48 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
[removed]
anzallos ยท 14 points ยท Posted at 23:21:59 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Better at a reminder for that too!
RyanKinder ยท 16 points ยท Posted at 00:08:55 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Remindme bot can't remind you of past events, yet.
anarcist69 ยท 8 points ยท Posted at 02:34:41 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Isn't the whole purpose of RemindMe bot to remind you of a past event? i.e. your comment
neilarmsloth ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 02:42:29 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
He means remind you of events that have already passed
ClintonHarvey ยท 12 points ยท Posted at 23:35:50 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
So....the love of your life is 10?
neilarmsloth ยท 83 points ยท Posted at 00:26:27 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
She's a whole lot more than that
Cylleruion ยท 10 points ยท Posted at 00:08:37 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
woosh
truepsuedonym ยท 14 points ยท Posted at 00:09:13 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I love that you guys are both sloths.
GrafikPanik ยท 25 points ยท Posted at 22:53:20 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
My name is Chris Hansen - please have a seat
neilarmsloth ยท 57 points ยท Posted at 22:56:43 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Do you have a booster seat and some crayons for my gf?
genryaku ยท 39 points ยท Posted at 23:38:59 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Wow you're seriously fucked up. You do realize you could use this joke on her twenty second birthday in 12 years, just change a few words.
GroovingPict ยท 16 points ยท Posted at 22:58:09 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
http://i.imgur.com/Ai0PNEo.png
neilarmsloth ยท 42 points ยท Posted at 23:01:48 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Nah dude she hasn't played with teddy bears in years, she's all about those iPad games now
[deleted] ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 03:13:15 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
This meme is still alive?
Akoraceb ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 00:43:09 on July 20, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Memes never die
[deleted] ยท 7 points ยท Posted at 22:47:49 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I think you have some explaining to do, sir.
ryanrjlim ยท 7 points ยท Posted at 22:42:20 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
22 years... so she's 10?
Tofabyk ยท 59 points ยท Posted at 22:46:20 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
That's the joke.
I hope
neilarmsloth ยท 28 points ยท Posted at 00:26:47 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
That's the situation, yes
[deleted] ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 01:22:37 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
[deleted]
neilarmsloth ยท 12 points ยท Posted at 01:42:24 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Why not both sweetheart
nofate301 ยท -3 points ยท Posted at 23:24:02 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Found the pedophile.
HotgunColdheart ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 23:37:33 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Early bird gets the worm.
badtimefrank99 ยท 32 points ยท Posted at 20:57:25 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Gotta remember this in 7 years...
batmanasb ยท 21 points ยท Posted at 21:53:05 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 7 years "Remind frank!"
An_Azelf ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 05:05:11 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
didnt see /u/badtimefrank99's name and my name is frank so you just creeped me out so much
badtimefrank99 ยท 7 points ยท Posted at 05:37:06 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Sorry frank.
An_Azelf ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 19:53:17 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
it's ok lol
Akoraceb ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 00:44:29 on July 20, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
My name is ok you just kinda creeped me out
WorstGabeNA ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 12:08:36 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe 7 years "Scare Frank"
laxation1 ยท 9 points ยท Posted at 22:08:57 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Remindme! 3.5 years
okmkz ยท 8 points ยท Posted at 22:24:58 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Uh
laxation1 ยท 6 points ยท Posted at 22:30:45 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Wife's not quite 32..
okmkz ยท 6 points ยท Posted at 23:18:03 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Oh right
herper ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 22:27:15 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)*
Remindme! 1 years
WakeskaterX ยท 15 points ยท Posted at 21:16:02 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I've got a year and a half of prep time. I can see the blank stare now!
aspbergerinparadise ยท 12 points ยท Posted at 22:06:25 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
you just have to wait 9 years and tell it on her 42nd
dvirpick ยท 9 points ยท Posted at 22:44:47 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
But then the punch line becomes more apparent (forty seconds for the 42nd vs half a minute for the 32nd). Though you could say "a little over half a minute" instead of "forty seconds".
๐๏ธ spacecatapult ยท 37 points ยท Posted at 23:02:23 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I think I'm going to wait until she's turning 62 to do this again. I have absolutely no doubts that I will remember. I have a hunch she might too. :)
IAmNotNathaniel ยท 46 points ยท Posted at 00:01:10 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
<calls up old ex-girlfriend in 30 years>
OP: Hi! I hope you enjoy your short --
Ex: OH MY GOD THIS IS WHY I LEFT YOU
pbjork ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 03:44:47 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Remindme! 30 years
aspbergerinparadise ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 22:47:38 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
2 thirds of a minute
Jarwain ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 00:19:21 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Or two thirds of a minute
phukka ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 21:50:13 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I need to remember this for about 8 months, or just start referencing it now.
lookatthatsquirrel ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 22:17:37 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I had mine 4 years ago...oh the regret
Tofabyk ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 22:46:57 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Make it the 40 second birthday in 9 years! YEAH!
achillesfist ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 05:56:14 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
You still have 42nd
BertMacGyver ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 10:56:53 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
My wife's is coming up in december. So much time to plan the puns...
420nanometers ยท 66 points ยท Posted at 21:24:05 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)*
When I was eleven, previews for The Lion King were coming out. It was Disney's 32nd animated film. This fact was announced by movie preview guy in quite a few trailers. I asked my friend how the movie could possibly be thirty seconds when even the trailer was longer than that.
I was not a smart child.
Edit: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=4sj1MT05lAA
parilmancy ยท 14 points ยท Posted at 23:14:24 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Listening to it, I can see why you might think that as a kid, as it pretty much sounds like "... presents its all new, thirty second, full length animated picture."
Have an upvote for making me chuckle.
hatgirlstargazer ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 02:49:42 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I remember that! It really did sound like they were talking about something 30 seconds long when you first heard it. I think that preview was on a VHS tape I had, I remember having a "wait, what?" moment each time I watched it. "How is thirty seconds full length? Oh, right, that's not what they meant."
420nanometers ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 03:47:18 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Yeah I can't remember which, but it was either on the Beauty and the Beast vhs or the Aladdin one :)
hatgirlstargazer ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 03:52:21 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Must have been Aladdin, I didn't have Beauty and the Beast on VHS.
I_press_keys ยท 17 points ยท Posted at 21:54:13 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Be sure to take 30 seconds making this joke after the 31st time, as that will be the 30-second iteration of the joke.
[deleted] ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 04:16:23 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Women never say what they really mean. This is all "girl code" that means she wants you to start telling the joke even more.
reddittwotimes ยท 18 points ยท Posted at 22:58:08 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I think she might just be a little bit upset because she won't be in her prime anymore.
๐๏ธ spacecatapult ยท 64 points ยท Posted at 22:59:45 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
True, but to be fair, 31 was also kind of an odd year for her.
[deleted] ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 00:07:18 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Well it surely wasn't an even year
Arc_Tan ยท 6 points ยท Posted at 03:23:16 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Thatsthejoke.jpg
image_linker_bot ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 03:23:49 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Thatsthejoke.jpg
Feedback welcome at /r/image_linker_bot | Disable with "ignore me" via reply or PM
OpinesOnThings ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 02:07:26 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Yeah...
joehumdinger ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 05:50:30 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Hehe
Sanityzzz ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 03:58:01 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Oh you
FiercelyFuzzy206 ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 00:02:15 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)*
[deleted]
cloud9ineteen ยท 6 points ยท Posted at 01:27:24 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
2 3 5 7 11 13 17 19 23 29 31
puppet_up ยท -2 points ยท Posted at 23:13:30 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I was thinking this, too. She is probably more upset at him for revealing her age to people than she is at the lame (and by lame, i mean AWESOME!) joke.
greenlion22 ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 22:16:00 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Your dad powers are strong enough to get her pregnant from that joke alone. Congrats.
[deleted] ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 22:49:24 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
What
MattTheProgrammer ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 20:59:31 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Hoping I remember this in two years....
gologologolo ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 23:52:15 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Definitely dad lingo
UseTheTrumpCard ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 00:28:19 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
"Time to delete her, hit facebook and dump the gym." -reddit
portapottypatty ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 00:18:59 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
She might not like it because you keep telling people how old she is.
๐๏ธ spacecatapult ยท 7 points ยท Posted at 02:26:10 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Keep in mind that timing is the key to comedy (and puns). I only bring this up when her birthday comes up in conversation. My goal is to see her tense up and give me a look the next time someone asks how old she's going to be.
portapottypatty ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 03:14:15 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Keep in mind another key rule of comedy: know your audience. Best of luck.
๐๏ธ spacecatapult ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 23:18:53 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I've know her since just after she celebrated her birthday for one third of a minute. I think I've got this one. :)
portapottypatty ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 03:59:23 on July 20, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
masturbating intensifies
Probably_A_White_Guy ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 04:10:41 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
This joke will live on, especially with the crowd born in later '84 / all of '85.
C88Alpha ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 07:03:28 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 10 years "thirty second birthday"
fapfapfapmaster ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 07:24:03 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 9 years "Thirty second berfdey"
[deleted] ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 12:04:34 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
melanogenic ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 16:29:18 on July 27, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 2 years
Cynical_Icarus ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 22:59:02 on November 11, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I'm visiting from the fuuuuuuttttuuuuurrreeee!!!!
I'm gonna use this in a couple years, thanks for the jokes
danoneofmanymans ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 02:49:39 on December 17, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 24 years 5 months
ev3studios ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 01:06:28 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
In my humble opinion, it's the repetition to numerous parties that sells this joke. Keep it up.
EarnThisMattDamon ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 23:09:07 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 6 months "30 second birthday"
boyhaveacigar ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 23:34:15 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I'm turning 32 in a few weeks, totally using this if I remember.
BeerIsFuel ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 23:53:55 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 2 years "thirty second birthday"
married4love ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 00:02:35 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 22 years "thirty second birthday"
Was_going_2_say_that ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 00:34:25 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Keep repeating it. She'll warm up to it
phasers_to_stun ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 00:36:16 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I like your dedication. Keep trying, man.
helixar ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 01:19:19 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 5 years "thirty second birthday"
wonderful_wonton ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 01:20:57 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Don't give up hope. Keep bringing it up in front of new people. She will start giggling any day now.
TheIceCreamMansBro2 ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 01:21:34 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
You gotta ask her to take a pregnancy test... based on this joke, I think you might be in for a surprise.
JoePrey ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 01:26:10 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I judge how good my jokes are with how quickly my wife tell me to stop.
StargateMunky101 ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 01:49:53 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I don't get it.....oh now I get it..... this is terrible... and thus perfect in everyway.
thehitchasers ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 02:00:03 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
32nd Tips!
rgh170 ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 02:46:19 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 9 Years "30 Second Birthday Dad Joke"
itshorriblebeer ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 03:02:23 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Persistence and repetition is the key. Especially, the delivery like its the first time you've ever told it.
super_unique_user ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 03:07:09 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Holy crap, my wife turns 32 on Sunday. I'm so using this.
[deleted] ยท -1 points ยท Posted at 23:34:31 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)*
[deleted]
Tumleren ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 23:42:51 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I can't even tell if this is real or satire
๐๏ธ spacecatapult ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 23:45:06 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
But my buddies aren't turning 32...
averagejoegreen ยท -1 points ยท Posted at 10:06:36 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
so shes not just got bad taste shes actually stupid.
JF42 ยท 468 points ยท Posted at 18:57:24 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
This is a good dad joke. The guy who posted the mushroom joke earlier could learn a lot from OP.
crazymanfish90 ยท 453 points ยท Posted at 20:02:49 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Yeah I agree there was mushroom for improvement on that one!
roastsGently ยท 105 points ยท Posted at 20:09:47 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Please spore me the details!
FLIGHTxWookie ยท 77 points ยท Posted at 20:16:45 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I missed that post. Was he not a very fungi?
aspbergerinparadise ยท 42 points ยท Posted at 22:05:45 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
he was just lacking in morels
FLIGHTxWookie ยท 31 points ยท Posted at 22:11:25 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
He's probably hit his cap though.
sehajodido ยท 56 points ยท Posted at 22:56:48 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Mushroom
EXTintoy ยท 19 points ยท Posted at 23:48:50 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Badger badger
Waterstealer ยท 6 points ยท Posted at 00:16:18 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
A snake a snake!
[deleted] ยท -1 points ยท Posted at 02:12:13 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
PSA: Newgrounds still exists!
Kanerodo ยท 11 points ยท Posted at 22:27:57 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I'd lichen him more to that of a novice at dad jokes.
Rlchv70 ยท 10 points ยท Posted at 21:13:33 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
And you can reuse it every ten years!
PVgummiand ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 07:46:38 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
It'll become tenuous in the long run though.
omnidub ยท 7 points ยท Posted at 00:48:04 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Link?
[deleted] ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 12:55:12 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
It's literally the second highest post on the sub right now
Not a single one of them laughed http://reddit.com/r/dadjokes/comments/4tf83l/not_a_single_one_of_them_laughed/
Shadowgale ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 23:58:08 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Must not be much of a fungi
MrStupidDooDooDumb ยท 205 points ยท Posted at 19:58:31 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
My thirty second birthday is coming up next May and I'm about to get about 9 months worth of mileage out of this one. Thanks!
hometowngypsy ยท 20 points ยท Posted at 22:22:56 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
You're also 16 again!
Delta365 ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 05:50:51 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
This is the comment that made it click for me finally. Thank you. You're a saint
[deleted] ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 00:05:16 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
....huh??
xbtdev ยท -4 points ยท Posted at 00:13:25 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
pregnant
purple_monkey58 ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 00:50:11 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Or they are going to use this joke until their birthday in 9 months
MrStupidDooDooDumb ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 06:02:30 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Yes this one was what I meant
xbtdev ยท -1 points ยท Posted at 00:51:46 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I also predict the day of birth will occur in 9 months.
purple_monkey58 ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 00:57:39 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
But you imply that a baby will be born. Or am i just reading it wrong?
xbtdev ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 01:02:53 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Consider that you are taking things too seriously on /r/dadjokes.
purple_monkey58 ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 01:09:37 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I......I'm going to go lie down.
juanbovjovi ยท 48 points ยท Posted at 21:30:59 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I don't think it works like that lol
ririplease ยท 37 points ยท Posted at 22:05:56 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I'm pretty sure that's exactly how my dad thinks it works
RednekNinja ยท 8 points ยท Posted at 04:39:25 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
no, that's exactly how it works.
At least that's what i learnt from my dad
Wlpxx7 ยท 82 points ยท Posted at 20:00:07 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I thought he was talking about his stamina... ( อกยฐ อส อกยฐ)
SpunkiMonki ยท 17 points ยท Posted at 22:46:15 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
But honey, every time we "celebrate" it's only for 30 seconds. Can you try a bit harder?
Zinouweel ยท 21 points ยท Posted at 18:41:55 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
fucking love that one
TrainAss ยท 37 points ยท Posted at 20:50:54 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Op, with that level of dadjoke, your gf might be pregnant.
The dadjoke is strong with you.
KingoftheHalfBlacks ยท 16 points ยท Posted at 20:40:30 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I'm stealing this next decade. It's beautiful.
B0Boman ยท 12 points ยท Posted at 21:16:19 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I just set an event in my Google calendar so I don't forget
BlackSight6 ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 22:49:19 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Works for 22nd (and every X2nd). Just say 1/3 of a minute or something like "less than half a minute."
[deleted] ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 02:13:49 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
It works for 22 as well.
KingoftheHalfBlacks ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 05:10:30 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Most of my circle has passed that milestone :/
Kappa_Swaggins ยท 31 points ยท Posted at 20:55:40 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I can't say 32nd without thinking 30-second now...
PopeMolestusXXX ยท 17 points ยท Posted at 21:40:23 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
She'll find it even funnier in 10 years when you're celebrating her forty-second birthday.
BloodyWanka ยท 7 points ยท Posted at 01:50:57 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
they will have so much more time to celebrate it!
[deleted] ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 02:14:40 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
As long as you remind her every year.
IndigenousOres ยท 15 points ยท Posted at 19:06:29 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Wow. I am so saving this one!
cerialthriller ยท 11 points ยท Posted at 01:50:41 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
My wife turns 32 soon I just used this one on her, apparently I'm "so fucking stupid"
chrisavs ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 20:20:58 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
My wife's 32nd birthday is coming up, consider this dad joke stolen!
PM_ME_VAG ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 20:51:14 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Putting this in my pocket for 10 years. You're the best worst type of person.
eric_sanders ยท 6 points ยท Posted at 22:24:50 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Oh my god I'm fucking crying. The best thing is, my wife turns 32 next year. I'm already excited about it!
theyquack ยท 10 points ยท Posted at 21:14:42 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 3/30/2019
sehajodido ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 22:59:27 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Hey we share the same birthday! You me and Van Gogh!
theblackcereal ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 23:30:01 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Here I was, in Europe, trying to figure out what the hell was the 30th month of the year... not proud of how long this took me.
dog_named_elvis ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 23:56:27 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 08/09/2019
RemindMeBot ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 21:14:49 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)*
I will be messaging you on 2019-03-30 21:14:44 UTC to remind you of this link.
5 OTHERS CLICKED THIS LINK to send a PM to also be reminded and to reduce spam.
Parent commenter can delete this message to hide from others.
matt5000 ยท 9 points ยท Posted at 23:18:00 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I'm 31, with a 31 year old fiancรฉ. I couldn't be more excited.
jeefray ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 23:33:39 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
62nd
uptotheright ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 20:08:33 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Maybe she thinks you were going to propose when you said "don't get your hopes up"?
adunahay ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 00:05:38 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
We should be friends.
harusp3x ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 01:00:27 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I feel like a lot of people in the thread didn't get the joke...
-steez- ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 22:12:11 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Dude keep it up. My dad also thought this was funny and he'll be using it on mom's 60-second birthday.
๐๏ธ spacecatapult ยท 6 points ยท Posted at 22:57:04 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Tell her it will be the best minute of her life!
-steez- ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 23:02:18 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Hahah I'll have my dad do that.
BeetsFX ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 22:55:58 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
When The Lion King first came out the previews celebrated it as Disney's 32nd animated feature film...I was young and was convinced this meant it was only 30 seconds long and fought all of my aunts, uncles, who would go to the theater for that, right? They were trying to tell me it was a full length film...no internet access back then so I held onto it until I saw the movie in theaters, I was wrong, they laughed, I cried, we moved on...
A_Rabid_Llama ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 02:46:55 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I came here to post exactly this!
Lucky for me, there wasn't anybody around to ask at the time and I forgot about it, until the realization came to me in a flash probably a decade later.
At the time, I remember thinking "wait, isn't this trailer longer than that? That can't be right..."
[deleted] ยท 6 points ยท Posted at 02:08:34 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
[deleted]
allyourbase51 ยท 7 points ยท Posted at 02:19:37 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
32nd, when read out, sounds like thirty-second, which sounds like thirty seconds, or half a minute.
dmarchu ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 20:53:23 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
hopefully I remember this when the time comes.
kerbuffel ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 21:11:30 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
My sister turns thirty two next year. This is gonna be awesome.
chryco4 ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 21:26:03 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
This is amazing.
Jason_OT ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 21:33:53 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Too soon? How does that work? Does she have a time machine?
pixiedonut ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 21:39:07 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
This is genuinely awesome and clever. I love it. The perfect pun.
[deleted] ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 22:44:24 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
It was my buddies 20 second birthday on Saturday! We just decided to make that a sort of beer drinking competition..
RufusMcCoot ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 23:48:17 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Wife is 31. Can I remember this in November? Am I really the guy who would put this on his calendar?
Probably, if I'm the type to have an existential crisis over it.
Reddit2Trend ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 01:25:06 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
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๐๏ธ spacecatapult ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 01:34:36 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Holy crap!
timskywalker995 ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 01:45:39 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Repetition is the key to humour!
poop_toilet ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 04:04:14 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Omg my dad's 62nd b-day is coming up. I'm gonna pull this one on him
WhisperingLightASMR ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 04:17:33 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Bawhahahaha! Clever man.
somedaveguy ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 04:50:31 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
As a kid, when I asked my grandfather how old he was, he told me "I'm dirty and grandma's dirty two".
I was a LOT older before it hit me.
ja647 ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 10:30:05 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I keep making sure to remind her of it every time we are around new people.
correction: my ex-girlfriend
Shiroi_Kage ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 22:26:29 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
3*2 is 6, and 32 is 9. Put them together and, viola.
[deleted] ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 02:16:33 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
/r/pervyteenagecomebacks
Shiroi_Kage ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 09:00:53 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
/r/pervymathematiciancomebacks
TotesMessenger ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 02:23:24 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I'm a bot, bleep, bloop. Someone has linked to this thread from another place on reddit:
If you follow any of the above links, please respect the rules of reddit and don't vote in the other threads. (Info / Contact)
PM_ME_YUR_VAG ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 21:11:20 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
She's prolly increasingly annoyed that there's no ring. Each year without one makes her madder if she's like many women I know.
chairfairy ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 21:48:49 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Oh man, this is so good.
My SO's 30th is coming up, which means I just have to remember this for two years.
chairfairy ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 21:48:59 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 2 years
thiefx ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 21:55:02 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 1 year 300 days
Endyo ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 21:49:58 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I've got two years for this joke to roll around in my head until I can make use of it for my birthday. I'm excited.
statichead2k ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 21:50:37 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I only have two more years to wait....so excited!!!
jsmits447 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 21:53:53 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
This is fucking hilarious.
ProudPilot ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 22:04:25 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! April 1, 2017 4/1/2017
catwalkjesus ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 22:10:52 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 7/12/2020
Locusts ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 22:15:32 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 3/4/2026
[deleted] ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 22:17:02 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
My GF is 32 also. We celebrated our 23 year anniversary last week...
sagmentus ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 22:23:29 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 04/17/2029
dave7882 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 22:28:47 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
YES! My wife turns 32 in 2 months.
Pornyz ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 22:32:48 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Bless me father
Kaboom3STi ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 22:47:07 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Wife's thirty second birthday is Sept 2. Can't wait to use this!
tomastaz ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 22:55:03 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
21 year old here. If it's any consolation I think it's hilarious
Blargh1111 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 23:33:41 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Ok, let me do all of the remind me folks a favor. You can do this once a decade from 22 - 52. Enjoy.
coocookuchoochoo ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 23:38:29 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
This took me far too long to get!
[deleted] ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 23:41:16 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
This took me forever to figure out, I'm ashamed. I was thinking it was a joke about trading in for a younger model, like you're getting rid of her in thirty seconds. I was not in the dad joke frame of mind.
[deleted] ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 23:42:46 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Keep it up! Remember to serve her tea in bed on #40 :)
synopser ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 23:43:11 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I turned 32 yesterday. It's funny no matter what she says!
hillsonn ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 23:44:30 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
This is good. I am going to keep it in my pocket.
notrightmeow ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 00:01:30 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I'm turning 32 in few days. Thanks.
Grommzz ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 00:04:57 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Turned 32 in May.
Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu :(
brook1yn ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 00:11:12 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Something about this thread makes me think it'll end up on me_irl
someguywhocanfly ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 00:32:52 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
This is a genuinely great one that I haven't heard before. You're a genius.
Loki_nighthawk ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 00:40:01 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
OMG, I just realized that my wife turns 32 this year. Bwahahahahaa!
We'll have to celebrate by watching the on of the shortest Disney movies, The Lion King, Disney's thirty second animated feature.
[deleted] ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 00:40:29 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Remindme! In eleven years
[deleted] ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 00:41:43 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Damn it! Just celebrated brother in laws birthday. Turned 32...why am I just now seeing this!
joker_of_the_deck ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 00:42:23 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I also turned "thirty too" soon :(.
BlackestNight21 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 00:49:46 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I remember my 32nd birthday. It went by so fast, seems like it was gone in 60 seconds. Maybe faster.
SueZbell ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 00:52:55 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Make sure she really enjoys that thirty 2nds.
So... that would be 31 joys ... first one, then 30 more?
unicyclebrah ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 00:54:08 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Still got a couple years to go, but I just put joke on my calendar to tell to my fiancรฉ on her thirty second birthday.
superdirtyusername ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 01:03:41 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I celebrated my 9th 25th birthday this year.
chrimata ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 01:14:33 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Your girlfriend is turning 30 right on time
I_explain_le_joke ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 01:24:15 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
you see, it's funny because the ordinal number, thirty-second sounds like the unit of time, thirty seconds.
secondhand_organs ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 01:31:23 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I just almost got backhanded
biritaz ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 01:42:40 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 5 years 8 Months
GiveMeHeadPhones ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 01:58:37 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I'm a little slow.. Thpughr you meant because the birthing process only takes 30 seconds or something. I got it now though
munkychum ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 02:07:20 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 8 months thirty second birthday
[deleted] ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 02:21:56 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Remindme! 2 years
StephentheGinger ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 02:39:27 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Remindme! 9 years 11 days
Phredex ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 02:40:44 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Best not to ask if she has begun to consider pre-arrangements yet....
[deleted] ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 03:04:42 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
my wife and I are turning 32 soon, absolutely stealing this
Scoopie ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 03:18:52 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 1 year
honermic ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 03:35:59 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Thank you, OP. Brightened a dark day for me.
Crazyfapman ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 03:57:35 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Note to self. Remember your 1 minute birthday next year.
note-to-self-bot ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 03:35:24 on July 20, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Just in case you forgot:
Remember your 1 minute birthday next year.
[deleted] ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 03:58:45 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
My wife turns 32 next week. I'm stealing this.
ronkyronx ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 04:13:45 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 1 year
TisteSimeon ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 04:20:48 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I'm 31 right now, I'm stealing this for next year!
ihateyougym ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 04:25:53 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Time to break up with her!
moa-ya ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 04:27:20 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 5 years
dmzxls ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 04:35:08 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
YES my wife's next birthday is 32!
Prcrstntr ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 05:47:06 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Hurry up and have some kids! Your dad humor is impeccable.
counterfatty ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 05:53:52 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Perfect! My SO is getting a 20s one this year.
Damadawf ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 06:22:39 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Poor OP, you're really really proud of yourself for this one! It's probably the high point of your life :(
Wunobi ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 08:01:38 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 10 years 7 months 1 day "hey man"
EvilNinjadude ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 08:29:46 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
And here I thought you'd say "My GF is turning thirty two soon. I wish she'd stayed young for longer."
gerrys123 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 09:54:48 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
This can only work if you bought her a Tutu for her Twenty Second birthday :)
MarkDeath ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 10:17:03 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 9th March 2022
MarkDeath ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 10:17:24 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 9th March 2032
ReckoningReckoner ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 10:29:43 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 12/04/2019
evdog_music ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 10:32:44 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
You better save it for her other birthday, since she's going to be thirty too.
lintelotiel ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 10:53:14 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
or is she turning thirty too soon?
nzgirl25 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 11:15:24 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
That's amazing.
gfjq23 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 12:23:56 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I turn 32 in a few months and I thought this was hilarious.
piratesas ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 12:48:24 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Good man
Invisible_Walrus ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 17:01:27 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 1 year 30 second birthday
Invisible_Walrus ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 17:01:58 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 1 year
technically_art ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 17:18:06 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I would've also accepted "Seems like just yesterday she was 29"
-dudeomfgstfux- ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 17:35:26 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I can use it on my mom for her 62nd birthday, that's more than enough time to celebrate it.
Xaeravoq2 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 23:19:38 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
this an extremely lame attempt at a joke
๐๏ธ spacecatapult ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 23:29:42 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Well then you can imagine my surprise when it received over 5000 upvotes and became one of the top 10 all-time posts on the subreddit. Welcome to /r/dadjokes!
Thanks for the feedback though too. I think she will be happy to know that of all the people that responded to the joke, there was at least one who agrees with her!
dkartik ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 02:04:43 on July 20, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
You are brilliant! It is my wife's 32nd this year, I will definitely be using this line.
The_Great_Danish ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 09:30:40 on July 20, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 15 years "Thirty-second birthday!"
LetsPlayDrew ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 21:30:57 on July 22, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 15 years "Thirty-second birthday!"
SaddleDaddy ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 02:09:40 on September 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
This joke is under alleviated
StarsOfVarda ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 21:34:16 on November 17, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 5 years 10 months "Thirty Second Birthday"
Ryanh1985 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 05:31:26 on November 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 1 year
salty_dirtpc ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 15:32:59 on December 9, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
RemindMe! 2 years "Twenty-second BD!"
oafman ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 07:51:00 on December 12, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Totally going to throw a surprise 30 second birthday party and have everyone lave after 30 seconds.
[deleted] ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 23:09:36 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I don't get it.
๐๏ธ spacecatapult ยท 20 points ยท Posted at 23:10:53 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Hi honey! When did you decide to get a Reddit account?
RetroPRO ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 23:15:09 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
She's celebrating her 32nd birthday. The joke being that 32nd birthday sounds like a 30 second(unit of time) birthday.
yaxamie ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 01:46:05 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Oh. This. This is good.
[deleted] ยท -3 points ยท Posted at 23:15:59 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
enh
RetroPRO ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 23:18:06 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
There's a reason it was posted to /r/dadjokes.
Knight-of-Black ยท -6 points ยท Posted at 06:43:01 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I had a feeling this was the joke. Jesus you fucking pathetic cunts will find anything funny wont ya.
ijohno ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 05:02:06 on July 19, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
I get it.... lol! omg. Dying
CMDR_Gila ยท -1 points ยท Posted at 20:21:25 on July 18, 2016 ยท (Permalink)
Judt likrlenmine who doesnt get jokes...