Do you know who I am? IโM THE MAN WHOโS GONNA BURN YOUR HOUSE DOWN!!! With the lemons. Iโm gonna create a combustible lemon that BURNS YOUR HOUSE DOWN!!!!!! le coughle extra hard cough
[deleted] ยท 11 points ยท Posted at 00:34:35 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
A lemon stealing whore
groatt86 ยท 7 points ยท Posted at 00:50:30 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
As soon as the ticket is put into the system electronically, there's sfa you can do. It's like ripping up a ticket given by a cop. She/he already has a copy that'll be put into the system. That LPT is sus
Simply put it on your dashboard. If you feel like being nice and make sure the wind doesn't blow it away or what have you, go ahead and put it in the glove compartment.
ig0rcm ยท 6 points ยท Posted at 20:25:57 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
K-Dogg1 ยท 36 points ยท Posted at 21:20:58 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
I donโt know about elsewhere, but in the UK, they put my first parking ticket in a sticky โdocuments enclosedโ envelope and stuck it to my door window
Don't most cities have a car that goes around with like 17 cameras pointed in every direction and they just take a picture of your license plate and mail you the ticket?
I've only ever gotten one ticket, and that was how I had gotten it. Despite being parked in a 2 hour parking zone with some bullshit fine print no one could read on the sign.
[deleted] ยท 822 points ยท Posted at 21:38:48 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Bonus LPT: You literally cannot get a parking ticket if you leave your baby in the driver's seat with the engine running while you do your errands as long as the baby is sober and buckled in.
I never take my baby anywhere unless it's high on PCP.
Percehh ยท 86 points ยท Posted at 00:01:15 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
I heard PCP isn't really that great for a baby so wait until they are a toddler otherwise you are being an irresponsible parent, assuming it's your kid not one you stole on which case give it meth, should be fine.
Why not Cannabis and get a chill baby who takes it one nap at a time
jef_snow ยท 7 points ยท Posted at 01:34:56 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
The really shitty LPT is always in the comments
XRT28 ยท 40 points ยท Posted at 23:15:23 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
BRB finding woman with really low standards to have a kid with, at the low low cost of around a quarter of a million by the kid's 18th, so I can avoid parking tickets.
D__ ยท 25 points ยท Posted at 23:34:07 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
No, they said "baby", so you need to keep replacing the kids with new ones when the old one runs out.
Mobidad ยท 15 points ยท Posted at 03:14:48 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
My old company would give you two weeks of paid leave when you had a baby. I had a plan that I would get 26 women pregnant, one every 2 weeks and end up with a year off with pay. My wife did not approve.
Mobidad ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 03:15:39 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Don't marry her. That way she'll be on food stamps and you won't have to pay for the kid.
Diesl ยท 6 points ยท Posted at 01:40:08 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
My dad avoided tickets because I was in the car, even with the engine off and I'm in the passenger seat.
[deleted] ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 01:44:56 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Correct!
Diesl ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 01:46:10 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Why is that? What's the technicality in the law?
[deleted] ยท 13 points ยท Posted at 01:48:21 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
No, you were correct about your dad leaving you in the car when you were little.
Diesl ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 01:49:57 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Relies on the state, but an example for California would be the Kaitlyn's Law. Which specifically targets leaving young children in the car while in a dangerous situation, or exactly as op stated, with the engine on/keys in ignition, without supervision.
This website gives a nice overview of the law. http://www.cityoflagunaniguel.org/DocumentCenter/Home/View/527
What if somebody were to take the ticket just to be a dick, or it blows away in the wind or something and you don't even know you've gotten it? I think most tickets around here now are stickers but I still see paper ones under the wiper every now and then
[deleted] ยท 1072 points ยท Posted at 20:04:28 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Not all places send letters. Other places - like where I live - send letters that arrive about the day after you need to respond / pay or you get a fine that's nearly the cost of the parking fine. It's a damn racket.
[deleted] ยท 11 points ยท Posted at 23:26:15 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
I remember reading some bulletin or policy on my college campus that the person obviously still has to pay the ticket and is responsible for it. Which, okay. But then they followed it up by saying something like because of that reason, no one should assume that an absence of a ticket means that one wasnโt issued, and that the person should call in when theyโre parked illegally to verify that one wasnโt issued.
[deleted] ยท 52 points ยท Posted at 21:08:00 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
In Hawaii, if it's a traffic infraction that doesn't get paid, it eventually gets sent to debt collectors. It will also prevent you from getting your yearly state vehicle registration sticker. If it's a traffic crime that requires you to go to court, it eventually becomes a bench warrant, then if you're ever pulled over you will be arrested.
In Quebec, Canada police vehicles have camera to scan if your registration is up to date and if there are any unpaid and uncontested tickets. If there is, the computer will beep and the police officer can pull over you. In some cases like expired registration your car can be towed. We don't issue sticker anymore and they will just send you 3 letters to remind you.
[deleted] ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 02:06:15 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Source? Sounds like they would have to pay a lot of money for that kind of software.
gbacon13 ยท 22 points ยท Posted at 22:32:54 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
I work as a parking enforcement officer at my campus. We put the tickets under a windshield wiper and take pictures of it and different angles of the vehicle. They also receive a letter and an email.
Another fun fact: we are a state university so if you donโt pay your ticket we garnish your PFD (Money that you receive every year as a resident of Alaska)
mikerichh ยท 11 points ยท Posted at 23:12:12 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
So the physical ticket is more to notify other officers this car has been here for x time and speed for the offender to pay?
[deleted] ยท -11 points ยท Posted at 00:48:12 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
[removed]
gbacon13 ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 00:50:47 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Do you mind if I ask why you donโt proofread what you type?
Itโs just a job bro, chill.
I know. I thought about that after I commented. Although in my neighborhood, and most of the streets in my town, we don't have curbs and street cleaners, we have a crew with brooms and shovels, yet we still get ticketed. The rule is only there for snow removal. If there's a huge storm, there is no parking on the street and I understand that. Alternative side parking tickets are just a way to make us pay for all the military grade supplies my local police think they need.
[deleted] ยท -12 points ยท Posted at 00:54:24 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Because I have a real job and donโt have time to proofread my comments on a some neckbeard site.
gbacon13 ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 00:55:22 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Iโm 19 and a full time student. You apparently have time for a lot of unnecessary stuff.
[deleted] ยท -8 points ยท Posted at 00:59:51 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
But why be a parking enforcement officer? Do you want your classmates, who will be future colleagues and employers, to hate you? There are much better jobs that pay the same.
gbacon13 ยท 9 points ยท Posted at 01:02:20 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Youโre overthinking it - I donโt care. Itโs convenient for me and it gives decent hours and decent pay. Also itโs FICA exempt.
[deleted] ยท -2 points ยท Posted at 01:11:33 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Well be sure to keep at it! In two years you might be able to be a garbage collector!
What if somebody were to take the ticket just to be a dick, or it blows away in the wind or something and you don't even know you've gotten it? I think most tickets around here now are stickers but I still see paper ones under the wiper every now and then
You get pulled over on your way to or from work one day and find out there has been a happy little accident warrant for your arrest over unpaid tickets and or having a suspended license for said unpaid tickets and you spend a day or three in county depending on the day and time of day you were arrested, get your hearing and get out. You pay the state their extortion money, and hope your job doesnt fire you for being a no call no show
highowl ยท 9 points ยท Posted at 00:24:22 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Yeah I don't think they're going to put you in lockup for one benchwarrant for unpaid tickets. They will fingerprint you, take your picture, and send you out the door with a court date. They can't prove you didn't get the tickets in the mail but they can prove they gave you got a court summons in person.
Yeah I don't think they're going to put you in lockup for one benchwarrant for unpaid tickets. They will fingerprint you, take your picture, and send you out the door with a court date.
Lmao you must have never been stopped in the south before. County lockup first, questions get asked later.
highowl ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 01:23:36 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
No, I live in the north; but I have been arrested before for something more serious than parking tickets and was ROR after I was fingerprinted and photographed.
Ereen78 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 01:49:56 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Failure to pay the ticket, and show up in court (paying the ticket is an admission of guilt) can/will result in a FTA warrant. You will go to jail.
But, dude is being way absurd on the three days. Everyone Iโve ever personally seen, you can pay the original fine, or sit in jail until you see the judge. Once youโve paid your overdue fines, your cut free.
bheal ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 02:03:48 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
You still get a letter. The better LPT is to place it on another car that's the same make and model. Majority of people won't look at the plate and will just pay it.
mmbepis ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 04:04:54 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
This actually happened to me. I had paid for parking that time though so I was surprised when I got a letter in the mail 2 months later. It also turns out you can only contest the ticket for up to 30 days until after the date it was written so I had to pay the bullshit fine.
I'm still not entirely convinced the person who wrote the ticket didn't just take it with them and throw it away to help the city get more money.
In CA you get a letter 7 days later as a reminder if you havenโt paid it yet. It also says that in 14 days the ticket will be late and an added penalty will be included in the fee because itโs late.
bnh1978 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 04:41:32 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Unethical life pro tip. Get a parking ticket? Find an adjacent car and put the ticket on that car. They might not notice that it isn't for their car and pay it anyway. If they do notice, you'll just get a letter in the mail latter...
sucobe ยท 28 points ยท Posted at 23:49:08 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
LPT: leave an old parking ticket.
[deleted] ยท 8 points ยท Posted at 00:13:02 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
I do this all the time. Parking is so terrible by my house sometimes I have no other choice.
[deleted] ยท 10 points ยท Posted at 00:54:00 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
[deleted]
sucobe ยท 13 points ยท Posted at 01:06:50 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
It is and if they notice theyโll write you up s new ticket and for forging. Itโs risky because you might get a parking guy that sees your car and not remember ticketing you.
I have a legit follow up question, how can they charge you for forgery if you haven't done anything to the ticket besides put it back? It would obviously be dated old and they could get you for that, but forgery?
sucobe ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 03:00:24 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Nah, I doubt thereโs rules against the forgery. It just makes you an easy target as technology updates allowing citations to update in real time. Some areas there may be multiple officers and you could get away that way. But most areas will have just one office per radius. They can also link up your license plate to the system to see if youโve been cited and how long ago.
[deleted] ยท 6 points ยท Posted at 01:09:54 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
[deleted]
sucobe ยท 9 points ยท Posted at 01:42:32 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
How lazy can you be. โTicket on my car. Bam paid. On to the next one.โ Without even looking at it. Iโm gonna try this and report back.
You want a giant full-sized peel & stick parking ticket glued to your driver's side window? They come with an adhesive, so evil, it requires power tools and caustic chemicals to remove
Have two sets of keys, so you can leave one the car in the ignition. Then, you can leave the car on all day and you won't need to worry about the car being too hot when you leave it in the sun
Bonus Lpt.
Replace your windshield wipers with Katanas. Only skilled Ticketers in the art of blade can have any hope of ticketing you.
[deleted] ยท 7 points ยท Posted at 00:59:12 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
The real tip here is either grab a ticket off someone else's window or put an old one under your blades. At a quick glance it'll look like you've been ticketed already.
Depends on the street signs I sโpose. In NYC for example, youโre not really allowed to even stop for few minutes if itโs a no stopping zone. Youโre legally only allowed enough time to let a passenger get in/get out in these areas.
Where I live (and probably most other places) the rule doesn't have to do anything with the state of the engine, but if you're near the car or not. Also leaving the car with a running engine will get it stolen, and will cost you a fortune because it'll ruin your engine on the long run, and you'll need a metric fuckton of gas, which is probably already more expensive than parking illegally and getting a ticket every day.
My school stickers students who don't have parking permits, and a kid who had manual roll-down windows left his windows down to avoid getting stickered. The security guard just rolled up a window and stickered him anyways.
Decyde ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 23:22:55 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Some kids in the high school in my town were pissed off at one of their teachers so they typed printed copies of his license plate and held a photo up of him while they ran red lights in town.
They were driving a similar car to his and the camera would send the tickets to his address. He never paid them since you could tell it wasn't him in it or his car but he wasn't happy about the entire situation.
[deleted] ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 03:01:44 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
I just picture an older, well meaning male cop, like a small town good cop cliche, loved by everyone in town. And he's trying unsuccessfully to tuck it under the full speed wiper. And he says something cute, like "Confound it"
Tickets you can throw away, but a boot is much more difficult to get rid of - that's why if I'm going to park illegally, I attach my own boots on all four tires.
When parking illegally, just put your hood up. For added effect, should you need to prove it, put the car in neutral before turning the key to mimic a perfect no-crank.
[deleted] ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 02:54:22 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Uh if you get a ticket, you move it to a similar car. The owner might think they got a ticket and pay it. I knew a guy who did this when I worked in SF, and he said it worked.
About 6 month ago I was in Cardiff. I came back to find my car without a ticket on the screen but I found it on the floor next to my car. It was a pretty windy day so I only assume it blew off and stuck to the wet floor.
I did not take the ticket with me.
Piyamakarro ยท 3628 points ยท Posted at 18:40:59 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
What do they do in that situation?
GiraffeMasturbater ยท 2368 points ยท Posted at 18:55:36 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Tuck it in the door
JayTurnr ยท 1464 points ยท Posted at 19:00:10 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
What if you have no doors?
JacksLackOfApathy ยท 3420 points ยท Posted at 19:47:45 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Then odds are you drive a Jeep and the local parking cops already know you by name.
Sincu0 ยท 952 points ยท Posted at 20:52:15 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
What if you don't have a name?
Nooooooxa ยท 814 points ยท Posted at 21:03:25 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
death
Sincu0 ยท 537 points ยท Posted at 21:04:22 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
What happens if you don't have death?
Nooooooxa ยท 660 points ยท Posted at 21:22:57 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
life
Sincu0 ยท 357 points ยท Posted at 21:24:09 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
What happens if the time is now for death?
Nooooooxa ยท 303 points ยท Posted at 21:29:10 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Creation of God
Sincu0 ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 21:29:43 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
What if his name is John Dinner in Spanish?
goodonestupid ยท 7 points ยท Posted at 02:14:36 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Oh my god ITS JUAN CENA
[deleted] ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 06:49:54 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Jesus Christ, it's Jason Bourne.
James24242 ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 22:29:33 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Who's God?
BusofStruggles ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 22:56:57 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
What if God was one of us?
lanternkeeper ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 11:31:00 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Just a slob like one of us?
groatt86 ยท 151 points ยท Posted at 00:50:03 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
What do we say to the god of death?
WaffleMiner ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 00:57:04 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Not today.
Swegtown804 ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 01:39:27 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Not today
[deleted] ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 05:15:37 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Not today
superspiffy ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 06:05:38 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Hey, Steve.
[deleted] ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 06:52:19 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Would you like an apple?
NixaB345T ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 06:17:06 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Not today
nadvargas ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 07:02:38 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Not today!
orangesoccerball ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 09:06:16 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Not today
Alias-_-Me ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 09:23:05 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Why not?
Acid_Fetish_Toy ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 10:22:30 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Not today
Njs41 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 10:39:03 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
https://i.imgur.com/D7rAkNX.jpg
catslapper69 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 13:00:39 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Not today.
lowjak ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 13:52:12 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Not today.
robotgeorgebush ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 15:27:22 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Not today
Yugi44p ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 00:59:46 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
"Oh. How's it hangin' Death?"
Kapn_Krump ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 01:10:36 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
"About fucking time you showed your ass up. Did you not get my emails?"
xozacqwerty ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 01:28:33 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Yes daddy ๐ฆ๐ฆ๐ฆ๐ฆ๐๐๐๐๐ฆ๐ฆ๐ฆ๐ฆ
groatt86 ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 01:32:12 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Is your name Persephone?
xozacqwerty ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 01:33:11 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Nah I'm Nox. I have no real roles in life!
dieyabeetus ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 02:08:19 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Stop hitting me with that wooden sword please.
jamaicanRum ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 02:23:09 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Bealzubub
QuoteMkII ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 03:33:54 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Please and thank you.
Junk-Bot_7 ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 04:15:53 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
"Could I get some more"?
JackTechnology ยท 131 points ยท Posted at 01:01:24 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Yes.
alphasingularity ยท 77 points ยท Posted at 00:43:46 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Johnnnnnn Cennaaaaaaa
fiendish_five ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 05:13:22 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Walks into heaven:
THE CHAMP IS HEEEERRRREEEEEEE AHH.
SystemError420 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 08:08:37 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Who's that?
shanemichaels ยท 178 points ยท Posted at 21:27:40 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Well I donโt have a life so thatโs a paradox.
Inspectorsteel ยท 75 points ยท Posted at 03:24:31 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
They'll stick the ticket in your fucking paradox.
-ShaOfCasuals- ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 03:48:39 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
mm yes daddy
SmokingCookie ยท 86 points ยท Posted at 22:09:38 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
/r/me_irl
hunnalo ยท 26 points ยท Posted at 22:00:20 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
If you're life what do you get? ...lemons?
RedCometComith ยท 22 points ยท Posted at 00:55:53 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Don't take life's lemons! Give them back! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons!!
livthebeast ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 18:09:39 on November 26, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Do you know who I am? IโM THE MAN WHOโS GONNA BURN YOUR HOUSE DOWN!!! With the lemons. Iโm gonna create a combustible lemon that BURNS YOUR HOUSE DOWN!!!!!! le cough le extra hard cough
[deleted] ยท 11 points ยท Posted at 00:34:35 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
A lemon stealing whore
groatt86 ยท 7 points ยท Posted at 00:50:30 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
World of Warcraft
Dark_Inferno98 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 06:39:55 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
If life gives you lemonade turn it into lemons life will be like whaaaa! Or if life gives you lemons squirt it into life's eyes
SlowRexx ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 02:43:02 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Fuck the lemons and bail
dumbchemisttho ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 00:27:31 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
What happens if you donโt have a life?
hunnalo ยท 7 points ยท Posted at 01:15:14 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
You Reddit
Master_JBT ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 00:59:02 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
What happens if you donโt have life?
MrTobor ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 04:01:30 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
There's an "I" in life, though. So, there's that.
edave64 ยท 8 points ยท Posted at 00:40:46 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
/r/fifthworldproblems
Mr_MeeSeek ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 02:34:16 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
If death dies, then nobody dies
nadroj19 ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 23:54:32 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
By snu-snu
snobord ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 23:55:25 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
By snusnu?
Jmath616 ยท 28 points ยท Posted at 21:16:08 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
A girl needs no name.
TwxntyEight ยท 8 points ยท Posted at 00:27:01 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Then you're a horse in the desert
[deleted] ยท 6 points ยท Posted at 22:35:22 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Then you are no one
Hcmichael21 ยท 6 points ยท Posted at 22:51:27 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
They obviously write it out to 'Arya Stark'
IncendiaryGames ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 08:03:24 on November 26, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
You're a horse with no name.
[deleted] ยท -1 points ยท Posted at 00:48:00 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
His name was Robert Paulson.
jwarr51493 ยท 21 points ยท Posted at 22:03:34 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
What happens if you live in the soft south and every other high school douchebag has a Jeep with no doors?
Doip ยท 16 points ยท Posted at 23:15:02 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Is that every other as in alternating yes no yes no or is it every other as in all of them but you?
jwarr51493 ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 08:08:14 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
50/50
TerkRockerfeller ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 02:54:48 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
/u/Doip busted
LittleKitty235 ยท 38 points ยท Posted at 19:27:10 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Congrats on just Matrixing the parking authority. Agents are en route Neo...run...
peterbjr ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 05:42:36 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Then they could put it inside your car? What?
Throwaway123465321 ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 23:49:17 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
You're probably on a motorcycle and wouldn't be likely to get a parking ticket anyway.
arrowkid2000 ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 23:53:32 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Turn on your car to maximum speed
jamaicanRum ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 02:22:09 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
As soon as the ticket is put into the system electronically, there's sfa you can do. It's like ripping up a ticket given by a cop. She/he already has a copy that'll be put into the system. That LPT is sus
Mr_MeeSeek ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 02:33:54 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Simply put it on your dashboard. If you feel like being nice and make sure the wind doesn't blow it away or what have you, go ahead and put it in the glove compartment.
ig0rcm ยท 6 points ยท Posted at 20:25:57 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Door wipers?
Reddingpanda ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 00:55:12 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
These bastards * waves fist *
dildoShwaginz420 ยท 662 points ยท Posted at 19:16:13 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
They can't give you a ticket
BabiesOnQuack ยท 57 points ยท Posted at 22:47:31 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Oh, I see
immoralatheist ยท 68 points ยท Posted at 21:08:22 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
This
OMA_ ยท 46 points ยท Posted at 21:18:49 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
They just slash your tires in my city.
scwol ยท 28 points ยท Posted at 00:38:07 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
That's not going to help the parking situation.
umaddow ยท 11 points ยท Posted at 00:40:34 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
It will reduce future parking violations.
TuPacMan ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 05:14:38 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Maybe they should post Tire Slashing Parking Enforcement signs
DetroitDiggler ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 01:01:54 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Hello neighbor
K-Dogg1 ยท 36 points ยท Posted at 21:20:58 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
I donโt know about elsewhere, but in the UK, they put my first parking ticket in a sticky โdocuments enclosedโ envelope and stuck it to my door window
ScarpaDiem ยท 23 points ยท Posted at 21:31:51 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
In the winter when people's wipes freeze, my city stuffs them in the gap between the hood and body.
thatwasnotkawaii ยท 6 points ยท Posted at 04:24:24 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
What if that part freezes?
binnes ยท 14 points ยท Posted at 04:58:52 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Then it's too damn cold
eqyliq ยท 8 points ยท Posted at 23:19:27 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
No ticket obv
ClubMeSoftly ยท 6 points ยท Posted at 00:28:53 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
But then you get throw out of the zeppelin
nicholas_snow ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 01:12:08 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
As a motorcyclist, they will stick it anywhere, they usually carry tape around here and tape it to an obvious area
nopedThere ยท 6 points ยท Posted at 20:14:30 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Wait until your car battery is dead?
Pennigans ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 01:50:46 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
I have an Optima. They can wait all day.
willak0 ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 00:50:19 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
The gap between the hood and the driver side quarter panel. NYC knows how to give me a ticket.
HunterSThompson64 ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 02:07:31 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Don't most cities have a car that goes around with like 17 cameras pointed in every direction and they just take a picture of your license plate and mail you the ticket?
I've only ever gotten one ticket, and that was how I had gotten it. Despite being parked in a 2 hour parking zone with some bullshit fine print no one could read on the sign.
immoralatheist ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 04:30:56 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
No, at least not in the US. I think I remember seeing that San Francisco had those installed on buses, but they are not commonplace in the US.
Archist- ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 06:51:15 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
What if you donโt have a car
Harrycover ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 07:16:28 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
In more and more city in my country, they have an electronic device and enter your license plate, then you receive your parking ticket via mail.
felixworks ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 00:35:39 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
This kills the parking enforcement officer.
jusstouchit ยท -1 points ยท Posted at 05:39:05 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Give you a ticket for that
[deleted] ยท 822 points ยท Posted at 21:38:48 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Bonus LPT: You literally cannot get a parking ticket if you leave your baby in the driver's seat with the engine running while you do your errands as long as the baby is sober and buckled in.
Mondayslasagna ยท 352 points ยท Posted at 22:46:32 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
I never take my baby anywhere unless it's high on PCP.
Percehh ยท 86 points ยท Posted at 00:01:15 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
I heard PCP isn't really that great for a baby so wait until they are a toddler otherwise you are being an irresponsible parent, assuming it's your kid not one you stole on which case give it meth, should be fine.
Hairless-Sasquatch ยท 42 points ยท Posted at 00:44:07 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
I am honestly appalled at this string of comments. You all make me sick. If your baby is on PCP or meth or anything like that you are garbage.
They need to set up with 100% pure Colombian sugar
black_rabbit ยท 20 points ยท Posted at 01:20:42 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Get out of here with that filth. Who wants a strung out baby?
What these kids really need is more sleep. So either benzos or H
jonrhunt ยท 7 points ยท Posted at 05:27:55 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
How about a little bit of GHB and my friend Spacey?
MrBojangles528 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 12:02:53 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
I think 'strung out' is generally a term for heroin addicts, like 'tweaker' is for meth.
Junk-Bot_7 ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 04:20:53 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Why not Cannabis and get a chill baby who takes it one nap at a time
jef_snow ยท 7 points ยท Posted at 01:34:56 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
The really shitty LPT is always in the comments
XRT28 ยท 40 points ยท Posted at 23:15:23 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
BRB finding woman with really low standards to have a kid with, at the low low cost of around a quarter of a million by the kid's 18th, so I can avoid parking tickets.
D__ ยท 25 points ยท Posted at 23:34:07 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
No, they said "baby", so you need to keep replacing the kids with new ones when the old one runs out.
iAMADisposableAcc ยท 19 points ยท Posted at 23:40:59 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
ULPT: Find a Casey Anthony
Mobidad ยท 15 points ยท Posted at 03:14:48 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
My old company would give you two weeks of paid leave when you had a baby. I had a plan that I would get 26 women pregnant, one every 2 weeks and end up with a year off with pay. My wife did not approve.
Mobidad ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 03:15:39 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Don't marry her. That way she'll be on food stamps and you won't have to pay for the kid.
Diesl ยท 6 points ยท Posted at 01:40:08 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
My dad avoided tickets because I was in the car, even with the engine off and I'm in the passenger seat.
[deleted] ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 01:44:56 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Correct!
Diesl ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 01:46:10 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Why is that? What's the technicality in the law?
[deleted] ยท 13 points ยท Posted at 01:48:21 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
No, you were correct about your dad leaving you in the car when you were little.
Diesl ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 01:49:57 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Lmaoooo yes, yes I was
shitpersonality ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 00:03:05 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Thanks, TIL!
_INPUTNAME_ ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 01:24:06 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Nope, you just get a ticket for leaving a child unattended instead.
Edit: http://www.cityoflagunaniguel.org/DocumentCenter/Home/View/527.
for example, in the state of California, it is illegal to leave young children in the car unattended while the engine is running.
SantosMcGarry2016 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 01:41:43 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Fake news!
_INPUTNAME_ ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 07:18:04 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Relies on the state, but an example for California would be the Kaitlyn's Law. Which specifically targets leaving young children in the car while in a dangerous situation, or exactly as op stated, with the engine on/keys in ignition, without supervision.
This website gives a nice overview of the law. http://www.cityoflagunaniguel.org/DocumentCenter/Home/View/527
SantosMcGarry2016 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 01:41:54 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
BIG IF TRUE!
MrMolester ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 05:27:32 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Business Opportunity Idea: Rent-a-Baby
[deleted] ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 05:42:25 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
...uuuhh...we might need to run some extra background checks on you.
Partially due to your username, but mostly due to your long running history of shit posting.
dwheelerofficial ยท 1247 points ยท Posted at 20:00:51 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Actually related question
What if somebody were to take the ticket just to be a dick, or it blows away in the wind or something and you don't even know you've gotten it? I think most tickets around here now are stickers but I still see paper ones under the wiper every now and then
[deleted] ยท 1072 points ยท Posted at 20:04:28 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
You still get a letter home
firefly6345 ยท 957 points ยท Posted at 20:52:56 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
But what if there's a sudden gust of wind in your home and the letter blows away?
jvarga11 ยท 546 points ยท Posted at 21:12:05 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Then they haul you away to jail for not getting the memo.
arkain123 ยท 409 points ยท Posted at 22:28:22 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
What if a hurricane blows the jail away?
Mondayslasagna ยท 307 points ยท Posted at 22:45:45 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Then all charges are dropped, and you just take the bus home.
arkain123 ยท 458 points ยท Posted at 22:59:17 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Man, the law is so easy to bamboozle
WHYRedditHatesMeSo ยท 58 points ยท Posted at 23:15:22 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Thatโs why itโs the law to have insurance
Speaking of which, for the price of one upvote...
[deleted] ยท 25 points ยท Posted at 23:24:19 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Show me ur tities i give u a vote
umaddow ยท 23 points ยท Posted at 00:42:18 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
K.
https://m.imgur.com/gallery/wyXQF
Bohorse_Jackman ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 03:25:43 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
that's some serious NSFW content, you should tag your comment
cartmanbrah69 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 08:50:52 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Risky click of the day
OneMansGlory ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 15:19:50 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Risky click of the day
Space_Lord- ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 02:34:49 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
First time I actually laughed at the word bambooze in a sentence. Thanks for that.
PR4Y ยท 9 points ยท Posted at 22:59:13 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
What if the bus breaks down?
klezart ยท 11 points ยท Posted at 23:18:48 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
What if the hurricane blows the bus away?
kmosdell ยท 14 points ยท Posted at 23:22:19 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
What if the bus blows away the hurricane?
[deleted] ยท 8 points ยท Posted at 03:39:30 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
What if the bus can't go below 50 mph?
itsallinn ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 06:40:31 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
but what if the hurricane took the bus with it?
Vir_Maximus ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 16:12:28 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
But what if the hurricane took your home?
ONLY_COMMENTS_ON_GW ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 22:45:11 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
What if your home blows away?
dwheelerofficial ยท 44 points ยท Posted at 20:09:04 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Oh I didn't know this. I thought it was only on the car and always just wondered what happened if it didn't get to you...
The1dookin ยท 32 points ยท Posted at 21:53:38 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
And they call your mother.
Xacto01 ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 00:53:12 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
What if your mother blows OP away?
sucobe ยท 13 points ยท Posted at 23:48:46 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
No letter in LA.
red_flash1029 ยท 20 points ยท Posted at 01:02:31 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
No more letters in LA
Please, baby, no more letters in LA
NoMorelolcats ยท 15 points ยท Posted at 02:34:34 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
๐๐
wm07 ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 02:27:01 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
i have only gotten a letter once it became delinquent in new york. and that doesn't even happen consistently. yes i've been delinquent more than once.
tperelli ยท 24 points ยท Posted at 00:15:52 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
I 100% have never received anything in the mail regarding a ticket.
[deleted] ยท 9 points ยท Posted at 00:21:10 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Its europe bruh we more sophisitcated
LaserGuidedPolarBear ยท 7 points ยท Posted at 01:44:32 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Not all places send letters. Other places - like where I live - send letters that arrive about the day after you need to respond / pay or you get a fine that's nearly the cost of the parking fine. It's a damn racket.
[deleted] ยท 11 points ยท Posted at 23:26:15 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
[deleted]
MysteriesOnWax ยท 9 points ยท Posted at 01:55:30 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
I get a letter saying I'm 30 days overdue and now owe an extra $15, but not one at the time of the infraction.
[deleted] ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 05:45:19 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
This is the real ticket.
AhemExcuseMeSir ยท 77 points ยท Posted at 23:15:08 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
I remember reading some bulletin or policy on my college campus that the person obviously still has to pay the ticket and is responsible for it. Which, okay. But then they followed it up by saying something like because of that reason, no one should assume that an absence of a ticket means that one wasnโt issued, and that the person should call in when theyโre parked illegally to verify that one wasnโt issued.
Riiiight.
Paradigms- ยท 68 points ยท Posted at 01:15:43 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
"Whoever is growing a small patch of cannabis in the garden, you've won a cruise! Report to security to claim your prize." -Dean Pelton
SantosMcGarry2016 ยท 9 points ยท Posted at 01:39:47 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Iโll always upvote Community!
Paradigms- ยท 6 points ยท Posted at 03:09:34 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Man I miss that show
[deleted] ยท 52 points ยท Posted at 21:08:00 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
In Hawaii, if it's a traffic infraction that doesn't get paid, it eventually gets sent to debt collectors. It will also prevent you from getting your yearly state vehicle registration sticker. If it's a traffic crime that requires you to go to court, it eventually becomes a bench warrant, then if you're ever pulled over you will be arrested.
GreatValueProducts ยท 21 points ยท Posted at 23:17:47 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
In Quebec, Canada police vehicles have camera to scan if your registration is up to date and if there are any unpaid and uncontested tickets. If there is, the computer will beep and the police officer can pull over you. In some cases like expired registration your car can be towed. We don't issue sticker anymore and they will just send you 3 letters to remind you.
[deleted] ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 02:06:15 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Source? Sounds like they would have to pay a lot of money for that kind of software.
GreatValueProducts ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 02:08:52 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
https://www.publicsafety.gc.ca/cnt/cntrng-crm/plcng/cnmcs-plcng/ndx/dtls-en.aspx?n=33
http://images.policemag.com/articles/M-ALPR-4.jpg
It is more and more common across Canada
http://www.ctvnews.ca/canada/ottawa-police-use-automatic-licence-plate-reader-to-nab-illegal-drivers-1.3055757
gbacon13 ยท 22 points ยท Posted at 22:32:54 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
I work as a parking enforcement officer at my campus. We put the tickets under a windshield wiper and take pictures of it and different angles of the vehicle. They also receive a letter and an email. Another fun fact: we are a state university so if you donโt pay your ticket we garnish your PFD (Money that you receive every year as a resident of Alaska)
mikerichh ยท 11 points ยท Posted at 23:12:12 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
So the physical ticket is more to notify other officers this car has been here for x time and speed for the offender to pay?
[deleted] ยท -11 points ยท Posted at 00:48:12 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
[removed]
gbacon13 ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 00:50:47 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Do you mind if I ask why you donโt proofread what you type? Itโs just a job bro, chill.
grandpagangbang ยท -2 points ยท Posted at 01:47:18 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Its a job for assholes. Like a door to door salesman or a repo man. It needs to be done but you're still an asshole.
ImAJewhawk ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 04:50:34 on December 15, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
The job will still exist even if it wasnโt him. Maybe donโt park illegally?
grandpagangbang ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 02:32:05 on December 16, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
you do realize you get parking tickets for bullshit reasons, right. Like alternate side parking in the middle of July......
ImAJewhawk ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 06:03:11 on December 17, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Yeah, streets still need to be cleaned in the middle of July.
grandpagangbang ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 06:41:08 on December 17, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
I know. I thought about that after I commented. Although in my neighborhood, and most of the streets in my town, we don't have curbs and street cleaners, we have a crew with brooms and shovels, yet we still get ticketed. The rule is only there for snow removal. If there's a huge storm, there is no parking on the street and I understand that. Alternative side parking tickets are just a way to make us pay for all the military grade supplies my local police think they need.
[deleted] ยท -12 points ยท Posted at 00:54:24 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Because I have a real job and donโt have time to proofread my comments on a some neckbeard site.
gbacon13 ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 00:55:22 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Iโm 19 and a full time student. You apparently have time for a lot of unnecessary stuff.
[deleted] ยท -8 points ยท Posted at 00:59:51 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
But why be a parking enforcement officer? Do you want your classmates, who will be future colleagues and employers, to hate you? There are much better jobs that pay the same.
gbacon13 ยท 9 points ยท Posted at 01:02:20 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Youโre overthinking it - I donโt care. Itโs convenient for me and it gives decent hours and decent pay. Also itโs FICA exempt.
[deleted] ยท -2 points ยท Posted at 01:11:33 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Well be sure to keep at it! In two years you might be able to be a garbage collector!
JoshBobJovi ยท 6 points ยท Posted at 01:17:50 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
I always check the post history to see if it's a spam account and I'm always disappointed this is just a real person being a dick to a stranger :/
[deleted] ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 01:22:24 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Like the other commenter is. He just does it for 8 hours a day.
cndeth ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 01:07:20 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
You are digging yourself deeper, dude...
[deleted] ยท -9 points ยท Posted at 01:05:22 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
[removed]
gbacon13 ยท 11 points ยท Posted at 01:06:41 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Lol Iโm done feeding the trolls
Slay3rrr ยท 8 points ยท Posted at 01:12:55 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Just don't park illegally and you won't get a ticket. It's that simple.
RichardMorto ยท 14 points ยท Posted at 23:22:37 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
You get pulled over on your way to or from work one day and find out there has been a happy little accident warrant for your arrest over unpaid tickets and or having a suspended license for said unpaid tickets and you spend a day or three in county depending on the day and time of day you were arrested, get your hearing and get out. You pay the state their extortion money, and hope your job doesnt fire you for being a no call no show
highowl ยท 9 points ยท Posted at 00:24:22 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Yeah I don't think they're going to put you in lockup for one benchwarrant for unpaid tickets. They will fingerprint you, take your picture, and send you out the door with a court date. They can't prove you didn't get the tickets in the mail but they can prove they gave you got a court summons in person.
RichardMorto ยท 8 points ยท Posted at 00:39:09 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Lmao you must have never been stopped in the south before. County lockup first, questions get asked later.
highowl ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 01:23:36 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
No, I live in the north; but I have been arrested before for something more serious than parking tickets and was ROR after I was fingerprinted and photographed.
Ereen78 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 01:49:56 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Failure to pay the ticket, and show up in court (paying the ticket is an admission of guilt) can/will result in a FTA warrant. You will go to jail.
But, dude is being way absurd on the three days. Everyone Iโve ever personally seen, you can pay the original fine, or sit in jail until you see the judge. Once youโve paid your overdue fines, your cut free.
bheal ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 02:03:48 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
I can personally verify that you are wrong.
imthebest33333333 ยท -2 points ยท Posted at 03:28:12 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Serves you right for breaking the law.
RichardMorto ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 05:09:01 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
One day it'll serve you or someone you love that way too. Wonder if you'll sing the same tune
imthebest33333333 ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 05:15:30 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Yeah, one day I'll get a parking ticket even though I never park illegally. Great logic.
RichardMorto ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 05:22:35 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Le law enforcement is infallible neva make mistakes
peteroftheevans ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 23:40:29 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
In the UK they send photos - this video explained how you โcouldโ get out of it https://youtu.be/2Gkiw7zpULo
jack2of4spades ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 01:17:19 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
You still get a letter. The better LPT is to place it on another car that's the same make and model. Majority of people won't look at the plate and will just pay it.
mmbepis ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 04:04:54 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
This actually happened to me. I had paid for parking that time though so I was surprised when I got a letter in the mail 2 months later. It also turns out you can only contest the ticket for up to 30 days until after the date it was written so I had to pay the bullshit fine.
I'm still not entirely convinced the person who wrote the ticket didn't just take it with them and throw it away to help the city get more money.
chickenchowmain ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 00:28:15 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Happened to me. They issued a second ticket. I had to pay both.
Hairless-Sasquatch ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 00:40:23 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Oh don't worry they make sure you get it. They send you another copy in the mail
willak0 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 01:35:02 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
You're still liable
14raymond14 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 03:37:52 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
In CA you get a letter 7 days later as a reminder if you havenโt paid it yet. It also says that in 14 days the ticket will be late and an added penalty will be included in the fee because itโs late.
bnh1978 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 04:41:32 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Unethical life pro tip. Get a parking ticket? Find an adjacent car and put the ticket on that car. They might not notice that it isn't for their car and pay it anyway. If they do notice, you'll just get a letter in the mail latter...
ieatrawsheep ยท 255 points ยท Posted at 20:20:13 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
You can just change your identity, move your place of residence, and get a new car to avoid these. No reason to get extravagant...
GnomeFetish ยท 69 points ยท Posted at 22:24:27 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
I just removed my windshield instead, that way you don't run down the battery.
peterthefatman ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 14:54:25 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
I removed my whole dash board so they can't put it on the dash with the glass removed
Realtuffy ยท 52 points ยท Posted at 23:59:01 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Why not just push your 'Park Anywhere' button AKA your hazard lights?
NipplesInAJar ยท 31 points ยท Posted at 19:28:36 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Amazing.
sucobe ยท 28 points ยท Posted at 23:49:08 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
LPT: leave an old parking ticket.
[deleted] ยท 8 points ยท Posted at 00:13:02 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
I do this all the time. Parking is so terrible by my house sometimes I have no other choice.
[deleted] ยท 10 points ยท Posted at 00:54:00 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
[deleted]
sucobe ยท 13 points ยท Posted at 01:06:50 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
It is and if they notice theyโll write you up s new ticket and for forging. Itโs risky because you might get a parking guy that sees your car and not remember ticketing you.
justinianthegreat ยท 7 points ยท Posted at 02:46:30 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
I have a legit follow up question, how can they charge you for forgery if you haven't done anything to the ticket besides put it back? It would obviously be dated old and they could get you for that, but forgery?
sucobe ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 03:00:24 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Nah, I doubt thereโs rules against the forgery. It just makes you an easy target as technology updates allowing citations to update in real time. Some areas there may be multiple officers and you could get away that way. But most areas will have just one office per radius. They can also link up your license plate to the system to see if youโve been cited and how long ago.
[deleted] ยท 6 points ยท Posted at 01:09:54 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
[deleted]
sucobe ยท 9 points ยท Posted at 01:42:32 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
How lazy can you be. โTicket on my car. Bam paid. On to the next one.โ Without even looking at it. Iโm gonna try this and report back.
HoldMyCoors ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 05:49:23 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Doesn't work for my area, they will give you multiple tickets over time.
H_Lon_Rubbard ยท 23 points ยท Posted at 23:06:25 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
You want a giant full-sized peel & stick parking ticket glued to your driver's side window? They come with an adhesive, so evil, it requires power tools and caustic chemicals to remove
IIIIIIIlllllllIIIIII ยท 7 points ยท Posted at 00:05:23 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Or just a razor blade ...
H_Lon_Rubbard ยท 24 points ยท Posted at 00:10:32 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
You're thinking of regular stickers.
These are made out of hate, and suffering.
IIIIIIIlllllllIIIIII ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 00:11:05 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Iโve learned the hard way unfortunately
[deleted] ยท -2 points ยท Posted at 02:49:38 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
[removed]
H_Lon_Rubbard ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 16:34:24 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
I haven't heard of a meter maid being shot.... like, ever
how often does it happen?
[deleted] ยท 88 points ยท Posted at 20:55:49 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
[deleted]
MuslimGangEnrichment ยท 57 points ยท Posted at 22:21:12 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Because if you don't pay the ruined and illegible ticket they can charge you more fees.
iusedtolikepokemon ยท 15 points ยท Posted at 21:36:40 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
That means you will have to leave the key with the car.
Edit: word
CaseyAndWhatNot ยท 23 points ยท Posted at 21:46:55 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
>Get remote starter so you don't have to leave the keys in the car and the battery won't die because the engine is running.
iusedtolikepokemon ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 21:51:26 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Damnit ur right, and just like the other guy said, buy a second key (or donโt lose the other one)
TFielding38 ยท 8 points ยท Posted at 21:48:55 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Have two sets of keys, so you can leave one the car in the ignition. Then, you can leave the car on all day and you won't need to worry about the car being too hot when you leave it in the sun
dirktorwho2 ยท 13 points ยท Posted at 23:39:55 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Or just activate Tesla's ticket-avoidance mode: https://youtu.be/bn1uzAJk-6o
jon_targareyan ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 00:28:38 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
This shit for real? I was looking at the video and honestly thought it was just a spoof at first.
basefield ยท 7 points ยท Posted at 00:37:41 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Check the upload date
Mindset_ ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 00:40:09 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
It was April fools.
thebirds ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 00:39:05 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Was released on April fool's day...
Hivac-TLB ยท 8 points ยท Posted at 05:04:55 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Bonus Lpt. Replace your windshield wipers with Katanas. Only skilled Ticketers in the art of blade can have any hope of ticketing you.
[deleted] ยท 7 points ยท Posted at 00:59:12 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
The real tip here is either grab a ticket off someone else's window or put an old one under your blades. At a quick glance it'll look like you've been ticketed already.
aleashedbottom ยท 5 points ยท Posted at 00:53:42 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
And if they hit you with their lights just drive away really fast....
ImAGirafffeAMA ยท 9 points ยท Posted at 22:20:19 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
I have been having a crappy day. And I actually laughed out loud for a solid 30 seconds. Thanks for this!
DinReddet ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 23:28:33 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
When I get rich I will definitely do this!
sighs__unzips ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 23:54:43 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Why would you want to get a job in parking enforcement?
DinReddet ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 00:30:37 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Obviously because I get a kick out of people hating me.
ilikeweirdthingstoo ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 23:59:23 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
But if your vehicle is running, are you officially parked?
M3RXGanma ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 00:23:52 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
You're standing which could possibly get you a ticket if you're there for too long
Synaxxis ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 00:59:22 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Depending on the state, you can also get a ticket for idling the engine. Limit is 3 minutes in NJ.
jon_targareyan ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 00:31:37 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Depends on the street signs I sโpose. In NYC for example, youโre not really allowed to even stop for few minutes if itโs a no stopping zone. Youโre legally only allowed enough time to let a passenger get in/get out in these areas.
Piggybank113 ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 07:55:21 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Where I live (and probably most other places) the rule doesn't have to do anything with the state of the engine, but if you're near the car or not. Also leaving the car with a running engine will get it stolen, and will cost you a fortune because it'll ruin your engine on the long run, and you'll need a metric fuckton of gas, which is probably already more expensive than parking illegally and getting a ticket every day.
Anthony_Boner ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 06:36:10 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
In UK its llegal to leave your vehicle running too
bassface69 ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 08:09:53 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Just take off your wipers so they donโt have any place to put it
torik0 ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 23:37:46 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
They slap an indestructible sticker on the driver window...
sucobe ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 23:49:47 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
We donโt have stickers in LA. Are they a bitch to take off?
[deleted] ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 00:12:53 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Except in Denver they put it in your door.
terraformers8 ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 00:46:01 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
I can hear the dry rubber screeching on the windshield now
spicycheetos1 ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 00:48:51 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
My school stickers students who don't have parking permits, and a kid who had manual roll-down windows left his windows down to avoid getting stickered. The security guard just rolled up a window and stickered him anyways.
Decyde ยท 4 points ยท Posted at 23:22:55 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Some kids in the high school in my town were pissed off at one of their teachers so they typed printed copies of his license plate and held a photo up of him while they ran red lights in town.
They were driving a similar car to his and the camera would send the tickets to his address. He never paid them since you could tell it wasn't him in it or his car but he wasn't happy about the entire situation.
[deleted] ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 03:01:44 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
[removed]
Anthony_Boner ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 06:36:57 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Reported
[deleted] ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 07:50:55 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
[deleted]
Decyde ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 19:11:21 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Not sure if you're retarded with your rant or you literally just didn't read my comment.
At no point did I mention anything you said nor did I even say I did it. I saw it on the local news and got a chuckle out of the picture they put up.
Hobi_Wan_Kenobi ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 00:08:10 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
I just picture an older, well meaning male cop, like a small town good cop cliche, loved by everyone in town. And he's trying unsuccessfully to tuck it under the full speed wiper. And he says something cute, like "Confound it"
ilikeweirdthingstoo ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 00:37:55 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Yeah but it says no.parking, not no stopping
ilikeweirdthingstoo ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 00:38:14 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Yeah but it says "parking" ticket
[deleted] ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 01:30:05 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
[removed]
Anthony_Boner ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 06:37:37 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
r/shittylifeprotips
[deleted] ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 01:34:33 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Fun, but then how do you move the car with a depleted battery?
LittleRedditAddict ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 01:46:57 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Possibly my very favorite. So many levels on this one.
HecubusJones ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 02:07:27 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Tickets you can throw away, but a boot is much more difficult to get rid of - that's why if I'm going to park illegally, I attach my own boots on all four tires.
Dankutobi ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 03:29:26 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Now I'm wondering how legal it is to own a boot.
BITCRUSHERRRR ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 02:50:59 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Just make sure it's raining so they can't put a ticket on your windshield. If they do, just say it got wet and ripped.
atlhawk8357 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 02:52:01 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
If that's the aim you're better off leaving a note under your windshield saying your battery is dead and you're unable to move it currently.
_no_usernames_left_1 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 02:52:04 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
When parking illegally, just put your hood up. For added effect, should you need to prove it, put the car in neutral before turning the key to mimic a perfect no-crank.
[deleted] ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 02:54:22 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Me listening to the radio.
BananaDragonz ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 03:02:01 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Itโs posts like this that make me feel the need for a r/shittyunethicalLPT
TheRealPascha ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 03:44:00 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
I thought it was so they are ould think you are coming right back and not "parked" parked.
SamGlover1256 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 04:30:12 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
This is advanced, next level stuff. This is like graduate level bad life pro tips.
passengerairbags ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 04:57:56 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Uh if you get a ticket, you move it to a similar car. The owner might think they got a ticket and pay it. I knew a guy who did this when I worked in SF, and he said it worked.
imabustanutonalizard ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 06:39:01 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
r/thathappened
nicktohzyu ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 05:53:36 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
There was this TV show called braniac in one episode they installed a liquid fart spray that was motion activated
TheBoiledHam ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 07:03:48 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
This is the kind of tip I come here for. Well done!
MolitovMichellex ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 07:53:59 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
About 6 month ago I was in Cardiff. I came back to find my car without a ticket on the screen but I found it on the floor next to my car. It was a pretty windy day so I only assume it blew off and stuck to the wet floor. I did not take the ticket with me.
Danisdaman12 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 20:28:55 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
I thought I was the only one who did this!
Leifbron ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 16:23:36 on January 16, 2018 ยท (Permalink)
My favorite.
Theappunderground ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 23:31:46 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
This is the best advice ive ever read in this hellhole.
dualpegasus ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 03:13:26 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Keep an old ticket, and put it under your wiper so they think yo already got one
AsevenX99 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 10:44:52 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
This was tested on a Norwegian tv show, did not work
[deleted] ยท -1 points ยท Posted at 00:34:10 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
LPT: Donโt park illegally
Capt_Turkey ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 13:09:50 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Thatโs a shitty LPT
MuslimGangEnrichment ยท -2 points ยท Posted at 22:20:18 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Park in the bike lane and I put pebbles in your valve stem caps.
[deleted] ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 01:47:13 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
I never understood why i canโt just play dumb and say it blew away or someone took it
imabustanutonalizard ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 06:40:06 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Because they will call you to pay it and you still have to
MILFenthusiast69 ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 03:04:22 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
No you're still in the system homie g
[deleted] ยท 0 points ยท Posted at 05:20:38 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
[deleted]
Andpeggy123 ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 04:43:12 on November 30, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Check the sub
[deleted] ยท -1 points ยท Posted at 21:21:25 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
[deleted]
ThisIsANotTakenID ยท 2 points ยท Posted at 21:30:16 on November 24, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Just leave it on duh
GunnyH1GHway ยท -6 points ยท Posted at 03:57:02 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
This won't work. not only will you have a ticket, but you'll also have a dead battery. PS, wipers wont even work with the ignition off. So NOjust NO
Techiastronamo ยท 3 points ยท Posted at 05:25:55 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
That's the point of this tip being in this sub though?
-_-
GunnyH1GHway ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 05:35:17 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
It was on r/all and said LPT.
Techiastronamo ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 08:16:55 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
But you can see what subreddit it is in regardless on /r/all.
GunnyH1GHway ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 08:52:44 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
I obviously didnt see it. As i explained.
Techiastronamo ยท 1 points ยท Posted at 08:59:12 on November 25, 2017 ยท (Permalink)
Huh, that's quite odd if it doesn't show it, but bugs happen... Fair enough.