Internal exception java.net.socketexception connection reset

My friend bought minecraft realms today and we are trying to join it. Neither of us can stay there longer than 1 min before everything freezes except for us, then we get kicked out with this error: "Internal exception java.net.socketexception connection reset". It feels like we have tried everything for the last 4 hours, but nothing works. We are playing on latest release 1.17.1. Why is 1.17.1 not an option for versions here?