Cannot connect to realms

The Game on Xbox doesn't let me join realms. I've paid for my own realm and when I join it let's me in the game after around 10 minutes of waiting and then nothing loads in so when I punch something it doesn't show that I'm breaking the block it just disappears. When I joined my friends realm he told me I was just standing still in his house when on my screen I wasn't near them but he could punch me from ages away. I've tried almost everything to get this to work again but nothing is able to fix my problem