Java Realm Lag

Bought realm and as soon as I started playing with a few friends I experience lag so bad that I get kicked out of the server every few minutes. Not internet because I don't experience in any other games or even minecraft multiplayer servers. Friends experience no lag and I have latest version of Java downloaded and tried multiple troubleshooting things and nothing has worked. I'm paying and can't even play on the server I am keeping it up for friends I don't know what to do.