extreme delay on realm

when i try to join my realm it takes at least 3-4 minutes to load. there is also an extreme delay in opening chests or inventory, mob movement, chunks loading in and respawning. mobs stay still most of the time and hostile ones don't appear to attack me. i end up getting killed by something i cannot see or kill and then it takes forever for me to respawn. when i break blocks or drop items they completely disappear but when i leave the game and rejoin they reappear. after about 10 minutes of being in the game the "connection timed out" and i have to rejoin all over again. if you could get back to me as soon as you can that would be great, i understand that you're probably really busy. Thanks!