Cannot connect to realm on switch

For some reason i cannot connect to realms on my switch. However i am able to connect on my xbox account. Support sent me here. Support is being not as helpful.

There are a total of 4 active members on this realm. One other switch user. Other switch user gets on ok (not in the same city, im going by their word of mouth) I have tried backing up, tried uninstalling and re-installing, checked my connection settings and it says everything is connecting ok.

I was even sent over to nintendo and nintendo got a supervisor involved and could not  figure out the issue and insists its on the minecraft end. 

MCID even checked out. honestly am at a loss especially since it seems like my lil bro can connect on his switch but i can't?