server unable to sync player data correctly

started up a local server for friends and I. at the start world worked fine but after 1-2 days of playing, any time me or buddy joined server would deadlock with no errors but in task manager you can see cpu usage ranging from 8-10% maxxing out one of the cpu cores 100%. this issue was happening every time a player would join/die-respawn/change dims.

after testing i thought it was chunks causing the issues but after digging around i found the server wasnt able to sync properly with the client which would cause the deadlock-loop effect.

 

also these deadlocks puts out NO errors or profiling reports even in debug shows nothing.